Wow... that's sad. I don't know how you can have something real with someone else when you are emotionally tied to your spouse. I understand the WANTING, but you have to deal with the current relationship before you move on. If the other person is there when you are available... they are. If they are not, well, would you really be able to connect with someone authentically if you are hiding a romantic relationship from your spouse? I think people should do whatever makes them happy, as long as they do not infringe on the rights of others. If you make a commitment to a person, you sever it before making another. And it would probably be a good idea to explore why the first one didn't work so that you don't make the same mistake. New love is like crack though, and people expect others to MAKE them happy. Nope.... Happiness/Satisfaction is something you have to work for yourself - and not get from outside people or sources. Can you imagine the burden? It is your job to make me happy!! I'd run from that immediately.