How to gently say no to a friend who asks you out on a date?

so i went shopping with a friend today, totally should have known something was up since no one really asks me for fashion advice, especially my guy friends.. anyway we are hanging out and its going great till the moment he tells me he likes me a lot more then a friend and asks if I would ever consider going out with him...

he is one of my closest friends and now I feel like I am going to lose him if I say no.. I have no interest in dating anyone though.

any advice?

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CaptainCanadia · 41-45, M

Fuck, sorry. It's a really, really hard position to be in.

All you can do is be honest, and be kind. If the reason is not personal, and it really is that you aren't going to date anyone, then tell him that. It is going to crush him, and there's no way to avoid that. You can just make it hurt the least you can.

PlumBerries · 31-35, F

thanks, he already knew I was taking a break from dating and I feel like if I say it again to him that it will be kinda like leading him on, like if I get to the point of wanting to date again, he might ask again thinking I will accept.. make sense?

CaptainCanadia · 41-45, M

If you were looking, would you be interested in him?

PlumBerries · 31-35, F

no, not because he isn't great but friends are off limits I think.. I wouldn't want them out of my life and dating me will do that I'm sure

CaptainCanadia · 41-45, M

Then all you can do is tell him "I'm sorry, you're great, but I don't date my friends." Legitimately, you can't let him down without hurting his feelings.

PlumBerries · 31-35, F

ehh I know you are right.. just don't want to do it but I guess best just to get it over with. thanks

CaptainCanadia · 41-45, M

And this will harm your friendship but it can get over this. I've known several good, long-term friends where one was hopelessly in love with the other and they just made it work.

PlumBerries · 31-35, F

hopefully. I am seeing him tonight, so will talk to him during that and will just be honest to him.. thanks for your advice