A true friend does support when one needs him/her the most. However, life is too fast and each individual is engrossed in different issues in his/her life.
Job-routine doesn't let one think about anything else. After the shift, an individual is utterly knackered. All he/she needs is a sound sleep or a companion with whom he/she may share feelings and feel lighter. Thus, a friend not being with one who needs him during the bereavement period is not a big deal now-a-days. It's understandable.
It's wise on one's part not to hold grudges against the one who wasn't there during the bereavement because he/she has other things to take care of.
In case, some manage to spare time for the friend in need. It's respectable but the same can not be expected from all...Opinions may vary and I respect opinion of others!...😊👍
If they are a true friend you needn't have to ask. They should be there for you no questions asked. If they have things to do or places to be the. How good a friend are they.
Supportive with an ear to hear, shoulder to lean on, mouth to kiss, hands to cook, ass to smack i think a good friend or lover leans into the situation boldly because they care for you