Is he just using her??

I don't see anything 'wrong' with what he's doing. My take on him is that he's a "Too nice" guy and doesn't know how to approach women as an equal. Yes, he sees he needs to shut a door on his girlfriend but he's wavering about how much he's going to hurt her feelings (duh - yes, but that's what runs in my head about him). As for your cousin - I think he's had a crush on her and is reading up on her to know more about her - definitely interested but isn't reading cues. What does she say - interested, yes, but does this mean wanting to coax him toward her or just let him come to her on his own? If she's waiting for him to move then he's made his move - as subtle as it is - He contacted her and is trying his best to find out about her likes and dislikes and possibly pick up a clue on what she might think of him. The lad is shy - if she's interested then she should move into his field and see what happens. Above all, he probably needs an ear to help him over this wall with his current girlfriend. Of course I might be totally wrong.... but there's no hurt going to happen to your cousin unless she's the type to jump before she looks.