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Have you discussed race in your relationship?

In all my relationships there has been a discussion with me about race. Me being black. Means it's scary to bring me home.
Even in a black community it was about my hair.
Long good
Skin tone: maybe too dark.
If you're dark are you smart or rich?
Will I fit into the culture. Being Caribbean the African guys I was seeing decided they couldn't marry me.
And the Caribbean born men deemed me too English to really understand Caribbean culture.
My Turkish partner wanted us to be together but his mum asked if I'd convert to Islam and I said no but if we had kids they would learn of both sides and get to chose. Big fat no no!

My Asian ex kept pushing me to get a better job, when we spoke he started suggesting my job would mean he would no longer need to work and he could stay at home. But that would be the compromise because his family would disown him if we wed!
Ugh!

My Irish boyfriend well his parents were old and he just said that they would find it very uncomfortable.

All very off putting conversations which made me realise that I had a lot to lose by taking that leap of faith in someone considering these things in the first place.

Ever had to deal with this nonsense?
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Human1000 · 51-55, M
When I was in my dating years in the 90s I would have been more conflicted about having a black girlfriend. That was stupid and cowardly. Now, I'd not hesitate, especially as I'm more attracted in general, to black women than white women!
Mellowgirl · 31-35, F
@Human1000 what changed?
Human1000 · 51-55, M
@Mellowgirl It was still a big deal in the 90s seeing an interracial couple. It's so common now where I live. I don't like to admit I was afraid, but that's the truth. I missed out.
Mellowgirl · 31-35, F
@Human1000 it was probably for the best.
Human1000 · 51-55, M
@Mellowgirl Because I couldn't have handled it? My bad about that...
Mellowgirl · 31-35, F
@Human1000 Well when we're young we're less likely to admit the truth. The anxiety could present itself in a really toxic way. Which in reality why should anyone be on the receiving end of.
In the context of race how can you ensure that you wouldn't have made a faux pas when trying to address the concerns?
Human1000 · 51-55, M
@Mellowgirl Good point -- I don't think I was mature enough at the time, and the anxiety would have not been fair to her.