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when I was younger I wouldnt have struggled to the extent I do now to understand women sometimes...

Precisely because I would have been in their heads because I was living it..

We dont know who we are or what we're after when we're young but I guess at least a few of us treasured self awareness enough to pick up a few books and start reading about it.

Struggling to understand ourselves.

Now that Im older and have accrued experience at least in regard to dating indecision is the least of my struggles.

Things in regards to desire are very stark and binary, the same way it is in the bedroom outside it.

Either Want or do not want. Sometimes maybe explicitly want not to but for the most part my sense of identity isn't what I struggle with.

I didn't come into this world understanding what I wanted in regards to the opposite sex, now thoguh I have a very strong idea what my type is.
rottenrobi · 56-60, F Best Comment
I agree. I always thought I knew what I wanted, but its taken me this long to see what's actually best for me.
What I wanted in the past, was always passionate, but too chaotic. What I'm looking for in a man now is completely different. :)
@rottenrobi Honestly seeing some men a lot of the girls in my past did Pick I could agree with you. passion is obviously a good thing but Ive seen the women who make their choice purely on its basis alone get REKTED. DESTROYED. want vs need are very different things and desire alone will destroy a lot of women...

fortunately some of you survived to old age but yeah... dating men is a mine field for women. Its not like it is for us- at least not to the same extent. we MIGHT get abused, but you are MORE Than likely to.
rottenrobi · 56-60, F
Thank you for the ba.
I tend to worry about all of us. Whenever we let our defenses and good judgement down, we're all vulnerable. There are so many people out there who set themselves up to be hurt or taken advantage of.
I've learned all this the hard way. Ive always had too much heart and less brain in the relationship arena. Lol.

I'm better now.

SammyJo · 51-55, F
It's like that old shop concept...

If a shoe shop sells only black or brown shoes then you only have that option...but if they start selling red, blue, white, green, pink then that can be a mindfield for the buyer..

Then there's the 'wants' and 'needs' thing - what you want is not necessarily what you need - stiletto's on a walking holiday etc...

Previous partners in my life have been part of the Ven Diagram that is pretty much under 'wants'; luckily, I have found someone that's more under my 'needs' section....and she's been great for, and to, me...

I am blessed to make the right decision and recognise the right person...

☺️

SJD xx

 
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