My Narcissist Ex Boyfriend Is Trying To Make Me Jealous. What would you do? (please read)

[i]My narcissist ex is going to desperate lengths for my attention. And he’s entirely too predictable. He sent me an email to my business email claiming he missed me. I never replied because I thought it was sooooo funny considering the fact that he was physically and verbally abusive and treated me like pure shit when we we’re together. All he did was try and break my spirit. We had fun but then the predictable lows, anger, infidelity and emotional cheating became too much for me to bear.

I distanced myself. I cut all contact, blocked on all socials And never looked back. It’s been 2 months since I stopped answering his calls. We haven’t spoke since.

But once he sent the message I can admit I was curious to just glance at his profile. I knew his motive was so that I can be curious to look at his page and see that he’s back cool again with a female “friend” that he originally talked so bad about and told me he was no longer cool with. He immediately used her for her for her photography and I also found that to be so predictable because he only reached out to her because he needed something from her. Narcissistic supply.

He had her blocked on social media and had to be sifting through his blocked-list looking to make amends with people he ran away. Realizing how lonely he truly is.

He also wants me to see all the things he’s up to. It’s a narcissists tactic to appear to be living this great life on social media once a breakup happens. I’m still not impressed because I know how much he embellishes his social media presence to look like he’s doing such big things when his accomplishments are quite average. But he’s very braggadocious and arrogant so let him tell it, he’s God’s gift to all women.

And honestly, me months ago would have been hurt by seeing him trying to make me jealous, but me now? I see right through him. He’s lonely and bored.

Missing what he had in me.

[c=#BF0080][b]
—Was I wrong for not replying to him?

—Should I let the “friend” Know that he said some nasty things about her?

—How do you cope with narcissistic exes?

—What do you do to move on?

— Has it been easy to move on?

— Do Narcissists receive their karma for the hurt they caused? [/b][/c][/i]

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SW-User

It sounds like you are yet to heal from this relationship. In my opinion,you should not respond to him. In fact,block him from all contacts/social so that it becomes harder for him to reach you in the first place. Be careful,narcs and people who are physically abusive can go to extreme lengths ,so let people know that he has been in touch,and if you are concerned for your safety, go to the police. Keep all evidence of communication you ever had with him and any new attempts of him trying to reach out for you. In fact keep traces of all of his moves,in case you do need to seek legal advice and protection. I would also advice seeing a therapist that can help you overcome any trauma created from a relationship of being with someone as such. The fact that you checked his social to see how he is doing after he contacted you tells me that you are still to heal completely from the relationship. Often people who experience narcissistic abuse find it hard to move on as they have been conditioned to believe they are powerless,worthless,especially without said narc. Speaking from a personal experience,that is.
As far as the new woman..if you are afraid for her physical health you could contact the police or social services and make a case of domestic abuse ,and if you have enough evidence it can be good to lead to legal action against him and in the least let others know who he truly is. If not,but you are afraid of her physical health,you can contact her anonymously. Either way it will probably lead to you being involved with him again,in one way or another. Ultimately.. it is your choice .
How to move on from a Narcissist..ha. it is a great question. Personally,it is a struggle. There are days where I believe I am at peace and comfortable in myself and other days where I feel extremely insecure afraid,vulnerable, and alone,without the abuser. I recognise I feel this way because I was isolated to the point that I was dependant on him and the I was emotionally and physically stripped away from all of my dignity and sense of self,so trying to rebuild that again it is a tough task,some days it feels impossible. So I'm still far from recovering myself and I truly do not have an answer,but you must remember to stay away. As hard as it may be.

Mrowe718 · 41-45, F

@SW-User of course I am not healed from the emotional anguish and torment from a narcissist. And never have I said I was healed. It will be a long road to recovery but I’m working on it. I know all too well about the narcissistic abuse and the effects I’m feeling because of it.

I am NEVER going back to him. I’ve done the back and forth with him already due to his hoovering. So even entertaining the “idea” of going back is out of my system.

He drained my soul and literally required every bit of my time and it wasn’t healthy.

I look up self-help material, YouTube videos from psychologists, relationship coaches and more. It’s all helping me. Slowly but surely.

In the mean time, this is why I’m here asking questions. I want professional therapy, not only for this situation but for myself period. It’s necessary but expensive. I’m currently looking for one that has a sliding scale rate.

SW-User

@Mrowe718 I understand. The fact that you used the term hoovering tells me you have already done a lot of research and also gathered insight as to what was happening to you. I get it.

To be honest I did not realise it was abuse myself until things got really out of control in the physical aspect and I began researching and realised that it was narcissistic abuse I was experiencing myself. I'm still to completely let go of his hoovering.

Where do you live? If you are from the UK there are many great organisations that help women who are victims of domestic abuse (emotional and ohysical) made up of professionals and people who have had similar experiences,so they are quite sympathetic while helpful . And they are free.
https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/