Ladies: How big a deal is a 10-15 year age difference in a man (older than you)?
61-69, M
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swirlie · 31-35, F
[c=#008099]
When I was 16, I fell in lust for a guy of 31 years who worked at my gym. We hung out for quite a while, but the mere 15 year age difference made it hard to keep up with him. He was into 'things' that I wasn't and his interest in music was lightyears behind mine. As well, he had more in common with my father than I did which really wasn't cool at the time.
After I turned 20, I would have business contacts with men who had 15 to 20 and sometimes 30 years of difference between our ages, which seemed to be fine all the time because age was suddenly declared irrelevant by all concerned.
But recently, a female business associate of mine who is now 65, mentioned to me that her husband is a mere 15 years older than she is and that they both met when she was 16 and he 31, which of course was equal to my own experience at the age of 16. Her husband however, just turned 80 last month, which would make sense since that mere 15 years of age gap seemed to follow them in lockstep for the past 46 years without missing a beat.
The problem is, when she turns 75 in ten years and is still running and doing yoga as she has always done, her husband will be 90.
It suddenly then occurred to me that age differences are only irrelevant in the mid-spectrum of life where both parties could conceivably have one night stands together on a whim or even go skydiving or water-skiing together and nobody would think anything of it. The fact that each one could keep up with the other meant that age differences were irrelevant.
But at the younger-end of life's spectrum where a legal 16 year old girl is spending her time with a 31 year old guy, it only looks weird and awkward, but if she doesn't actually look like him in any way then she can never be mistaken for his daughter in front of his friends.
And at the senior-end of life's spectrum where a legal 75 year old girl is now pushing the wheelchair of her 90 year old geriatric life-mate through the hallowed halls of a long-term care facility, it not only looks weird and awkward, the girl is more likely to be mistaken as the guy's daughter than she would ever have been when she was 16. That is not cool.
Is a 10 or 15 year age difference a big deal you ask?
As long as you're currently living life within the mid-spectrum of life itself and neither one of you require a personal aid to assist you into or out of a bathtub or the back seat of his 20 year old Crown Vic at drive-in movie theater, then no, 15 years of age difference is not a big deal.[/c]
When I was 16, I fell in lust for a guy of 31 years who worked at my gym. We hung out for quite a while, but the mere 15 year age difference made it hard to keep up with him. He was into 'things' that I wasn't and his interest in music was lightyears behind mine. As well, he had more in common with my father than I did which really wasn't cool at the time.
After I turned 20, I would have business contacts with men who had 15 to 20 and sometimes 30 years of difference between our ages, which seemed to be fine all the time because age was suddenly declared irrelevant by all concerned.
But recently, a female business associate of mine who is now 65, mentioned to me that her husband is a mere 15 years older than she is and that they both met when she was 16 and he 31, which of course was equal to my own experience at the age of 16. Her husband however, just turned 80 last month, which would make sense since that mere 15 years of age gap seemed to follow them in lockstep for the past 46 years without missing a beat.
The problem is, when she turns 75 in ten years and is still running and doing yoga as she has always done, her husband will be 90.
It suddenly then occurred to me that age differences are only irrelevant in the mid-spectrum of life where both parties could conceivably have one night stands together on a whim or even go skydiving or water-skiing together and nobody would think anything of it. The fact that each one could keep up with the other meant that age differences were irrelevant.
But at the younger-end of life's spectrum where a legal 16 year old girl is spending her time with a 31 year old guy, it only looks weird and awkward, but if she doesn't actually look like him in any way then she can never be mistaken for his daughter in front of his friends.
And at the senior-end of life's spectrum where a legal 75 year old girl is now pushing the wheelchair of her 90 year old geriatric life-mate through the hallowed halls of a long-term care facility, it not only looks weird and awkward, the girl is more likely to be mistaken as the guy's daughter than she would ever have been when she was 16. That is not cool.
Is a 10 or 15 year age difference a big deal you ask?
As long as you're currently living life within the mid-spectrum of life itself and neither one of you require a personal aid to assist you into or out of a bathtub or the back seat of his 20 year old Crown Vic at drive-in movie theater, then no, 15 years of age difference is not a big deal.[/c]
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
[c=#008099]
Were you just testing the waters before embarking upon a new life with an older woman?![/c]
[c=#008099]
Were you just testing the waters before embarking upon a new life with an older woman?![/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie Actually, the other way around. I was with one woman for 20 years, married, had 2 kids, and ended up divorced in my 50's. So after FOUR relationships since my marriage ended (two kind of fizzled out, one died, and another broke my heart) I'm single at the age of 60 (in a couple of months). While I'm not ridiculously hung up on age (my shrink is my age, and she's stunning, but happily married), big surprise, I very often find myself drawn to women who are generally 9-10 years younger than me. So I'm just soliciting feedback from the AWESOME women in this AWESOME online community! And you make some very astute points - - nobody wants to deal with their lover deteriorating. The only real counterpoint I can make is that we really don't know - - that scenario becomes the end game only if nothing else happens. I think that love is about doing whatever you're called upon to do for your mate, whatever that looks like. Any of us can drop dead with a heart attack or brain tumor, or the younger party can lose their legs in a car wreck. But yeah, barring some other, larger event, I'd have a 75 year old woman dealing with my crazy old ass, lol. Getting old is not for the faint of heart! Thank you for your very thoughtful input, too. 🙂
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
While I'm not ridiculously hung up on age (my shrink is my age, and she's stunning, but happily married), big surprise, I very often find myself drawn to women who are generally 9-10 years younger than me.
[c=#008099]
Two points I would like to make here:
1) Re: your "shrink". My question to you is, how do you know she is happily married? What evidence have you been given that would support your claim?
2) Did you know the French have an equation to the aging process which is designed for both men and women?
It goes like this... The perfect aged woman for a man, is half the man's age plus 7 years.
So let's say you are now 60. Half your age (30) + 7 years = 37
The 'youngest' woman you should even attempt to get involved with should be no younger than 37 years of age.
Conversely, the oldest man a 37 year old woman should ever attempt to get involved with should not be older than 60 years of age.
Please let me know your answer to point #1. [/c]
While I'm not ridiculously hung up on age (my shrink is my age, and she's stunning, but happily married), big surprise, I very often find myself drawn to women who are generally 9-10 years younger than me.
[c=#008099]
Two points I would like to make here:
1) Re: your "shrink". My question to you is, how do you know she is happily married? What evidence have you been given that would support your claim?
2) Did you know the French have an equation to the aging process which is designed for both men and women?
It goes like this... The perfect aged woman for a man, is half the man's age plus 7 years.
So let's say you are now 60. Half your age (30) + 7 years = 37
The 'youngest' woman you should even attempt to get involved with should be no younger than 37 years of age.
Conversely, the oldest man a 37 year old woman should ever attempt to get involved with should not be older than 60 years of age.
Please let me know your answer to point #1. [/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie I like that rule! 37 would seem like a debutante to me, lol. Well, I don't know for a fact that my shrink is happily married...that is an assumption on my part, primarily because she's a very astute therapist, and as far as I can tell she's on the money with fostering communication and in depth understanding of different feelings and perspectives. All I can say is if she's not happily married, her husband must be an idiot. But they have grandkids, and she wears a big diamond wedding ring, which from my experience women can cease to do when they just aren't feeling it. And she SEEMS happy, very natural and at ease. So of course it's an unknown, but I'd be very shocked to learn otherwise. And I'd probably give her up as a therapist and ask her out.
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
...that is an assumption on my part, primarily because she's a very astute therapist, [c=#008099]Observant on your part, but irrelevant to her truth.[/c]
...she's on the money with fostering communication and in depth understanding of different feelings and perspectives. [c=#008099]Very intuitive on your part, but irrelevant to the truth of her private life.[/c]
..But they have grandkids, [c=#008099]Sweet to hear, but irrelevant. She has nothing to do with the sex life of her married children.[/c]
...and she wears a big diamond wedding ring, [c=#008099]TOTALLY irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. A ring is used for many things as part of a woman's arsenal, one of which means that she is married, or pretends to be married, or pretends that she is not available to men if she is single. The ring represents any function a woman ascribes to it's function, which also means the ring's presence contains any meaning that your perception wants to assign to it when you see it. Of itself, a piece of gold with a diamond inset is nothing more than store-bought jewelry. [/c]
...which from my experience women can cease to do when they just aren't feeling it. [c=#008099]With all due respect, your experience has missed the mark of a woman's underlying truth. Again and with respect, your experience is not reflective of how women feel, but only reflective of how you as a male 'think' women feel. With your track record, what do you really know for absolute certain about women? Seriously.[/c]
..And she SEEMS happy, very natural and at ease. [c=#008099]So does an inactive volcano immediately before it's status changes. Again, what SEEMS to be the case only means that you really don't know for sure. And again, what you don't really know for sure is therefore an irrelevant aspect of your perception of what her true desires are.[/c]
..So of course it's an unknown, [c=#008099]This is the only relevant point you have made so far. Do you have any more you'd like to try out?[/c]
...that is an assumption on my part, primarily because she's a very astute therapist, [c=#008099]Observant on your part, but irrelevant to her truth.[/c]
...she's on the money with fostering communication and in depth understanding of different feelings and perspectives. [c=#008099]Very intuitive on your part, but irrelevant to the truth of her private life.[/c]
..But they have grandkids, [c=#008099]Sweet to hear, but irrelevant. She has nothing to do with the sex life of her married children.[/c]
...and she wears a big diamond wedding ring, [c=#008099]TOTALLY irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. A ring is used for many things as part of a woman's arsenal, one of which means that she is married, or pretends to be married, or pretends that she is not available to men if she is single. The ring represents any function a woman ascribes to it's function, which also means the ring's presence contains any meaning that your perception wants to assign to it when you see it. Of itself, a piece of gold with a diamond inset is nothing more than store-bought jewelry. [/c]
...which from my experience women can cease to do when they just aren't feeling it. [c=#008099]With all due respect, your experience has missed the mark of a woman's underlying truth. Again and with respect, your experience is not reflective of how women feel, but only reflective of how you as a male 'think' women feel. With your track record, what do you really know for absolute certain about women? Seriously.[/c]
..And she SEEMS happy, very natural and at ease. [c=#008099]So does an inactive volcano immediately before it's status changes. Again, what SEEMS to be the case only means that you really don't know for sure. And again, what you don't really know for sure is therefore an irrelevant aspect of your perception of what her true desires are.[/c]
..So of course it's an unknown, [c=#008099]This is the only relevant point you have made so far. Do you have any more you'd like to try out?[/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie "With your track record, what do you really know for absolute certain about women? Seriously."
I find your comments deliberately cruel and argumentative. Every statement I made was qualified by "I'm assuming" or "it's an unknown". What point is it you're trying to make? That I'm a loser because of my track record? Please keep your thoughts to yourself. I know a sociopath when I see one with dead certainty. Have a great life.
I find your comments deliberately cruel and argumentative. Every statement I made was qualified by "I'm assuming" or "it's an unknown". What point is it you're trying to make? That I'm a loser because of my track record? Please keep your thoughts to yourself. I know a sociopath when I see one with dead certainty. Have a great life.
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
[c=#008099]
😂 Calm down, stud muffin!
What I was stating in saying to you, "With your track record...", I was actually reflecting upon your own factual accounting of what your track record had been, all of which you had stated to me in the previous post!
Here is what you said:[/c]
"I was with one woman for 20 years, married, had 2 kids,
..divorced in my 50's.
..FOUR relationships since my marriage ended,
..I'm single at the age of 60
[c=#008099]
Once again I ask, with a track record of having more failed relationships to your credit than probably the total number of cars you have ever owned in the last 40 years, what else would you call it?!
That is why I was inferring to you, that if you don't know anything about women as is clearly evident by your track record, then why would you pretend to know what all those things you listed mean, regarding what you 'assume ' the social status is of your 'shrink'?
What I was trying to point out to you, was that you don't have a clue about the status of your stunning 'shrink', as evidenced by what you 'think' and 'assume' all those things actually mean that you mentioned to me!
That is why I told you on each one of my analyzed points, that what you think and thus have assumed about her, is so far off the mark from many women's true reality, that you are potentially letting this opportunity with her slip through your fingers, because of the assumptions you have made.
What you have assumed however, could in fact be the opposite truth of who she is and what she is all about. But you don't know that for sure!
And if you don't want me to be deliberately 'blunt' about the irrelevant assumptions you have made regarding the women in your life, then I'll sugar-coat it if that's what you really need in your life!
Will a nice sugar coating of patronizing bullshit make you feel better about the assumptions you have made about the last 5 women in your life? 🤔 [/c]
[c=#008099]
😂 Calm down, stud muffin!
What I was stating in saying to you, "With your track record...", I was actually reflecting upon your own factual accounting of what your track record had been, all of which you had stated to me in the previous post!
Here is what you said:[/c]
"I was with one woman for 20 years, married, had 2 kids,
..divorced in my 50's.
..FOUR relationships since my marriage ended,
..I'm single at the age of 60
[c=#008099]
Once again I ask, with a track record of having more failed relationships to your credit than probably the total number of cars you have ever owned in the last 40 years, what else would you call it?!
That is why I was inferring to you, that if you don't know anything about women as is clearly evident by your track record, then why would you pretend to know what all those things you listed mean, regarding what you 'assume ' the social status is of your 'shrink'?
What I was trying to point out to you, was that you don't have a clue about the status of your stunning 'shrink', as evidenced by what you 'think' and 'assume' all those things actually mean that you mentioned to me!
That is why I told you on each one of my analyzed points, that what you think and thus have assumed about her, is so far off the mark from many women's true reality, that you are potentially letting this opportunity with her slip through your fingers, because of the assumptions you have made.
What you have assumed however, could in fact be the opposite truth of who she is and what she is all about. But you don't know that for sure!
And if you don't want me to be deliberately 'blunt' about the irrelevant assumptions you have made regarding the women in your life, then I'll sugar-coat it if that's what you really need in your life!
Will a nice sugar coating of patronizing bullshit make you feel better about the assumptions you have made about the last 5 women in your life? 🤔 [/c]
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
[c=#008099]
So now, here we have a psychopath who referred to me as a psychopath, yet the psychopath I am referring to is actually the one seeing a 'shrink', not me!
My question is, are you seeing a 'shrink' because of your psychopathic tendencies, or are you seeing a 'shrink' because you think she has the answers to why your relationships with women have failed 5 times?
Has she ever brought to your attention that you know fuck-all about having a meaningful relationship with women? Just curious! 🤷🏼♀️[/c]
[c=#008099]
So now, here we have a psychopath who referred to me as a psychopath, yet the psychopath I am referring to is actually the one seeing a 'shrink', not me!
My question is, are you seeing a 'shrink' because of your psychopathic tendencies, or are you seeing a 'shrink' because you think she has the answers to why your relationships with women have failed 5 times?
Has she ever brought to your attention that you know fuck-all about having a meaningful relationship with women? Just curious! 🤷🏼♀️[/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie What a piece of work you are. Telling someone to go fuck themselves who's kept circling back, begging for the privilege, is not remotely psychotic. In older parlance, it's referred to as standing up for oneself. On the other hand, spending your evenings on the Internet, goading strangers on a social media site to discuss personal matters with you, and then using that information to attack and belittle them, is at a minimum borderline psychotic. And yes, I'm quite happy with my gorgeous, happily married, highly competent shrink, and if I've ever encountered another person who needed one of their own, it is certainly you. And just for the record, my "5 failed relationships" including my divorcing my ex wife because I caught her cheating on me, 2 others I ended because I actually do have really good fuck all instincts about women (hence my derision for you), another died, and how dare you speak about this dear woman as if you have an iota of real information in your head about it, you poisonous little cunt. The fifth relationship was ended by my ex girlfriend, and as I stated, it broke my heart. The very fact that you could read the words "one died, and another broke my heart," and see that as your cue to get your knives out demonstrates beyond any doubt that you are a deeply disturbed and despicable individual. I feel sorry for anyone unfortunate enough to be in your life, if there is indeed any such person. And once again, please do feel free to go fuck yourself.
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
[c=#008099]
Studmuffin, you are forgetting something! When you say:[/c] Telling someone to go fuck themselves who's kept circling back, begging for the privilege, is not remotely psychotic..[c=#008099] please keep in mind that it was YOU who has repeatedly told ME to "go fuck myself" which began from you in a single post, after you failed to understand what I was trying to bring to your attention about your 'shrink'!
For a guy like yourself who keeps making repeated reference to your astounding ability to identify a sociopath whenever you see one..[/c]I know a sociopath when I see one with dead certainty. [c=#008099]..it would seem to me that with all of your repeated references to.. [/c]minimum borderline psychotic. [c=#008099]..or perhaps [/c]deeply disturbed and despicable individual. [c=#008099]...or perhaps your classic line.. [/c]please do feel free to go fuck yourself. [c=#008099]... it would suggest to me as you project what you obviously feel about your own state of mental health, that your 'shrink' is not actually giving you your money's worth. Obviously, she is completely ineffective in dealing with your bazaar state of mind.
May I suggest you find a new 'shrink' who looks just like you, who can talk like a drunken sailor just like you can, who can make the same belligerent sounds typical of an old man with dementia just like you can, at which point your new 'shrink' would then likely be able to diagnose your ongoing antisocial behavior which has obviously followed you from one social misgiving to the other. Time for a new 'shrink' there stud muffin! [/c]
[c=#008099]
Studmuffin, you are forgetting something! When you say:[/c] Telling someone to go fuck themselves who's kept circling back, begging for the privilege, is not remotely psychotic..[c=#008099] please keep in mind that it was YOU who has repeatedly told ME to "go fuck myself" which began from you in a single post, after you failed to understand what I was trying to bring to your attention about your 'shrink'!
For a guy like yourself who keeps making repeated reference to your astounding ability to identify a sociopath whenever you see one..[/c]I know a sociopath when I see one with dead certainty. [c=#008099]..it would seem to me that with all of your repeated references to.. [/c]minimum borderline psychotic. [c=#008099]..or perhaps [/c]deeply disturbed and despicable individual. [c=#008099]...or perhaps your classic line.. [/c]please do feel free to go fuck yourself. [c=#008099]... it would suggest to me as you project what you obviously feel about your own state of mental health, that your 'shrink' is not actually giving you your money's worth. Obviously, she is completely ineffective in dealing with your bazaar state of mind.
May I suggest you find a new 'shrink' who looks just like you, who can talk like a drunken sailor just like you can, who can make the same belligerent sounds typical of an old man with dementia just like you can, at which point your new 'shrink' would then likely be able to diagnose your ongoing antisocial behavior which has obviously followed you from one social misgiving to the other. Time for a new 'shrink' there stud muffin! [/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie Shucks, you called me studmuffin again! While you obviously enjoy your delusions of having clairvoyant powers, let's please try to keep it between the lines...you've no way of discerning what if any belligerent sounds I make, or how old I look or behave. And while I'm always open to suggestions, I think it'd be a lot more fun to get my gorgeous, happily married shrink talking like a drunken sailor instead of finding a new one. And I have actually never been accused of antisocial behavior by anyone (actually, just the opposite) - - I merely responded to your antisocial behavior with strident contempt and open hostility. But since you seem to be unwilling to walk away from it, let's begin, shall we?
First, I'd point out that using bazaar as an adjective is really fucking bizarre. Also, just to clarify, I've only invited you to go fuck yourself twice (so far). With your first obnoxious, troll-like and inexplicably cruel response, I refrained from any suggestion of auto-eroticism, and merely asked you (I said please) to keep your thoughts to yourself.
And no one, my dear, could possibly fail to understand the tediously simplistic "point" you thought you were making about my utterly innocent assertion that my shrink was happily married. So the best I could give you for your astute observations as to the knowns and unknowns in this equation would be "No shit." I'd rather explore why this is how you entertain yourself in the evenings, as a self proclaimed expert in human relations.
First, I'd point out that using bazaar as an adjective is really fucking bizarre. Also, just to clarify, I've only invited you to go fuck yourself twice (so far). With your first obnoxious, troll-like and inexplicably cruel response, I refrained from any suggestion of auto-eroticism, and merely asked you (I said please) to keep your thoughts to yourself.
And no one, my dear, could possibly fail to understand the tediously simplistic "point" you thought you were making about my utterly innocent assertion that my shrink was happily married. So the best I could give you for your astute observations as to the knowns and unknowns in this equation would be "No shit." I'd rather explore why this is how you entertain yourself in the evenings, as a self proclaimed expert in human relations.
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
[c=#008099]
Let us not forget that it is YOU who is under the care of a Psychiatrist, not me.
What you are projecting onto me in your mindless rant is precisely how you feel about yourself, which I'm sure your Psychiatrist is dealing with on a regular, ongoing basis with you anyway.
Just to let you know that despite your Psychiatrist's professional endeavors regarding your personal case history, you are still doing it! You are still projecting onto others how you actually feel about yourself.
The fact that you would launch into an unexplainable tirade right out of the gate when I tried to tell you very objectively how little you knew about women, particularly how much you 'assumed' to know about your 'shrink', would tell me that you are mentally unstable, which of course is probably why you are seeing a Psychiatrist on a regular basis in the first place.
I tried to tell you that your assumptions regarding the social status of your 'shrink' could actually be the exact opposite of what her social situation is at it's core, but you weren't interested in hearing anything about my objective, rational opinion of what her social status 'might' in fact be!
Instead of listening to my point and hearing me out to see where this would go, perhaps finding out what I could impart to you from all of this, you decided that what YOU knew about your Psychiatrist's private life was far more than I could EVER speculate about that woman in particular!
Granted, I've never met your Psychiatrist, but then again, I don't need to meet her nor anyone else just like her to impart to you what you clearly have not learned about women in your life. I was never intending from the outset to undermine the information you had provided to me; it was you who played that card to yourself which then torpedoed our discussion.
Maybe you should tell her about your unstable reactions here with me, just so she can further document what she already knows about you? 🤷🏼♀️ I'm sure your Psychiatrist would be interested in hearing about it, particularly about the part that directly involves her!
And if you do somehow grow the balls to tell her about your unstable reactions here with me which I highly doubt you'd have the balls to do, don't make the mistake of inquiring about her personal life before you ask her out.[/c]
[c=#008099]
Let us not forget that it is YOU who is under the care of a Psychiatrist, not me.
What you are projecting onto me in your mindless rant is precisely how you feel about yourself, which I'm sure your Psychiatrist is dealing with on a regular, ongoing basis with you anyway.
Just to let you know that despite your Psychiatrist's professional endeavors regarding your personal case history, you are still doing it! You are still projecting onto others how you actually feel about yourself.
The fact that you would launch into an unexplainable tirade right out of the gate when I tried to tell you very objectively how little you knew about women, particularly how much you 'assumed' to know about your 'shrink', would tell me that you are mentally unstable, which of course is probably why you are seeing a Psychiatrist on a regular basis in the first place.
I tried to tell you that your assumptions regarding the social status of your 'shrink' could actually be the exact opposite of what her social situation is at it's core, but you weren't interested in hearing anything about my objective, rational opinion of what her social status 'might' in fact be!
Instead of listening to my point and hearing me out to see where this would go, perhaps finding out what I could impart to you from all of this, you decided that what YOU knew about your Psychiatrist's private life was far more than I could EVER speculate about that woman in particular!
Granted, I've never met your Psychiatrist, but then again, I don't need to meet her nor anyone else just like her to impart to you what you clearly have not learned about women in your life. I was never intending from the outset to undermine the information you had provided to me; it was you who played that card to yourself which then torpedoed our discussion.
Maybe you should tell her about your unstable reactions here with me, just so she can further document what she already knows about you? 🤷🏼♀️ I'm sure your Psychiatrist would be interested in hearing about it, particularly about the part that directly involves her!
And if you do somehow grow the balls to tell her about your unstable reactions here with me which I highly doubt you'd have the balls to do, don't make the mistake of inquiring about her personal life before you ask her out.[/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie hahaha Well, that is a solid point out of the old playbook. Quite correct, you never inquire about a girl's personal life before asking her out - - she'll certainly tell you if it interferes with her going out with you, and it comes across as unmanly to ask first.
For someone decrying unfounded assumptions, you sure are hurling them out there yourself. For starters, I am not "under the care" of anyone. I don't have a psychiatrist; I talk to a psychologist roughly once a month. No prescriptions, no form of medical "care," just conversation and advice. Interestingly enough, my shrink and I have a great rapport, and at our last meeting she pronounced me "delightful". I do think you're wrong about me, and I'd like to think I've been wrong about you, since according to you I've been wrong about women almost entirely anyway. So perhaps it's possible.
So to the degree that I went overboard with my verbal assaults, I apologize. I will say, however, that being insensitive and patronizing to someone you don't even know sets off alarm bells...this was the reason I treated you to my anger and nastiness. Really not me. I also have more rhetorical "balls" than you'd know what to do with - - I live my life as an open book, and I always tell the truth. If I were really concerned about my reactions to you as unstable, I would not hesitate to bring them up with her. As a matter of fact, I requested one of my friends on SW to read our thread, with the question, "Am I nuts?" Her response to your comments which precipitated all of this was "Yikes!" (in reference to yourself). Another friend on SW could only see my side of our exchanges, because she had already blocked you eight months before.
So please, enlighten me: what is this golden wisdom you wanted to impart to me about what I have clearly not learned about women in my lifetime? Because believe me, there isn't a man out there who wouldn't want that information. If you would, please include your current relationship status and "track record". I showed you mine.
For someone decrying unfounded assumptions, you sure are hurling them out there yourself. For starters, I am not "under the care" of anyone. I don't have a psychiatrist; I talk to a psychologist roughly once a month. No prescriptions, no form of medical "care," just conversation and advice. Interestingly enough, my shrink and I have a great rapport, and at our last meeting she pronounced me "delightful". I do think you're wrong about me, and I'd like to think I've been wrong about you, since according to you I've been wrong about women almost entirely anyway. So perhaps it's possible.
So to the degree that I went overboard with my verbal assaults, I apologize. I will say, however, that being insensitive and patronizing to someone you don't even know sets off alarm bells...this was the reason I treated you to my anger and nastiness. Really not me. I also have more rhetorical "balls" than you'd know what to do with - - I live my life as an open book, and I always tell the truth. If I were really concerned about my reactions to you as unstable, I would not hesitate to bring them up with her. As a matter of fact, I requested one of my friends on SW to read our thread, with the question, "Am I nuts?" Her response to your comments which precipitated all of this was "Yikes!" (in reference to yourself). Another friend on SW could only see my side of our exchanges, because she had already blocked you eight months before.
So please, enlighten me: what is this golden wisdom you wanted to impart to me about what I have clearly not learned about women in my lifetime? Because believe me, there isn't a man out there who wouldn't want that information. If you would, please include your current relationship status and "track record". I showed you mine.
swirlie · 31-35, F
@wanderingelf
So please, enlighten me: what is this golden wisdom you wanted to impart to me about what I have clearly not learned about women in my lifetime?
[c=#008099]
My dialogue to you thus far has already revealed what you needed to know about your 'shrink' or any woman for that matter who wears a wedding ring.
My eventual intent was to encapsulate everything you ever needed to consider about women into once simple post, probably 3 short paragraphs at most. But instead, my input became thinly spread across damn near a dozen posts comprised of hate-filled comments and self-defensive posturing.
Truth is, your SW friend who only offered you "Yikes" instead of constructive wisdom or even likely a completely written sentence containing a single complete thought, is speaking more about her own self-image than what she perceives mine to be. Truth is, she knows nothing about me. The reason I know this is because I do not interact with people on SW who only offer one-word answers in any typical post that they make. Their inherent illiteracy is not worth dealing with.
And your other SW friend who blocked me 8 months ago, probably blocked me back then because I revealed to her, her own truth as well at some point or another and most likely she didn't like hearing it from a complete stranger.
So yes, it doesn't surprise me that she would choose to enter into a state of denial by blocking all contact with someone who knew as much about her as she did about herself of which probably scared the living shit out of her. After all, for a person to block someone on SW is really about that person choosing to enter into a state of 'hiding' as they exercise their panic option to push that 'block' button when they feel emotionally challenged in some way.
Do I give a shit about either of your SW friends? Absolutely not. I'm sure they're both very nice people when they're away from their computers. Their combined comments and opinions however, are totally irrelevant to our conversation in the grand scheme of things.
So I bless you to your good, hope your Patient/'Shrink' relationship proves to be nothing but medically fruitful for you and I wish nothing less than a plethora of stunningly beautiful women to flood endlessly into your life.
Have fun with those new women you will now attract to yourself and seek nothing but the best among them. And never settle for less. I mean it![/c]
So please, enlighten me: what is this golden wisdom you wanted to impart to me about what I have clearly not learned about women in my lifetime?
[c=#008099]
My dialogue to you thus far has already revealed what you needed to know about your 'shrink' or any woman for that matter who wears a wedding ring.
My eventual intent was to encapsulate everything you ever needed to consider about women into once simple post, probably 3 short paragraphs at most. But instead, my input became thinly spread across damn near a dozen posts comprised of hate-filled comments and self-defensive posturing.
Truth is, your SW friend who only offered you "Yikes" instead of constructive wisdom or even likely a completely written sentence containing a single complete thought, is speaking more about her own self-image than what she perceives mine to be. Truth is, she knows nothing about me. The reason I know this is because I do not interact with people on SW who only offer one-word answers in any typical post that they make. Their inherent illiteracy is not worth dealing with.
And your other SW friend who blocked me 8 months ago, probably blocked me back then because I revealed to her, her own truth as well at some point or another and most likely she didn't like hearing it from a complete stranger.
So yes, it doesn't surprise me that she would choose to enter into a state of denial by blocking all contact with someone who knew as much about her as she did about herself of which probably scared the living shit out of her. After all, for a person to block someone on SW is really about that person choosing to enter into a state of 'hiding' as they exercise their panic option to push that 'block' button when they feel emotionally challenged in some way.
Do I give a shit about either of your SW friends? Absolutely not. I'm sure they're both very nice people when they're away from their computers. Their combined comments and opinions however, are totally irrelevant to our conversation in the grand scheme of things.
So I bless you to your good, hope your Patient/'Shrink' relationship proves to be nothing but medically fruitful for you and I wish nothing less than a plethora of stunningly beautiful women to flood endlessly into your life.
Have fun with those new women you will now attract to yourself and seek nothing but the best among them. And never settle for less. I mean it![/c]
wanderingelf · 61-69, M
@swirlie While the sentiment is much appreciated, I really don't need a plethora - - I just want one!
