I just don't know how to pick them.

I was once in a bad relationship and so I lived years in solitude and fear of ever getting back into another relationship. Met a guy and we got a long fine only to find out he is married. He says they don't live together. I knew he had kids but he always refer to her as his ex-girlfriend. I asked why didn't he didn't tell me he is married. He said, "You never asked. You asked if I had a girlfriend". I feel like I have let myself down once more. Not broken hearted but just want to kick myself for a I guess not asking that too. I feel so foolish with relationships. I just think I will never end up with someone who is truly for me. Feeling so defeated. Please don't kick me while I'm down just felt like venting.