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Quakertrucker · 70-79, M
Asking someone to marry is not the same as hitting on them for sex.
If you ask someone to go to bed and they say no, you should assume that no means no.
But, if you ask someone to marry, no can mean never, or it could mean maybe later, or it could mean I'm just not ready yet.
When I first met my wife - of 19 plus years now - she had been divorced for 9 years following two short marriages of about 2 years each.
I knew immediately that she was the one woman that I desired to marry. So, I slowly pursued her for over two years.
After about a year, I asked her to marry me, and she said no, but we remained friends. After about six months mire, I asked her again, and was again told no. As before, we stayed friends.
After about another six months, I asked her again and she said yes.
She has told me since then, that having been divorced twice and single for 9 years, she was not sure that she wanted to be married again. She said that knowing me for two years - and knowing my love for her and my interest in her - convinced her that she did want to be married.
We both agree that we love each other more than anyone else, and that being married brings more joy and intensity to our lives than anything else.
If my response to her first no - or to her second no - had been, "oh well, I'll see you around", both of our lives would have been immeasurably reduced.
Sometimes, no just means not yet. Be attentive and patient and persistent, but not pushy.
I am totally in love with my wife!
Quakertrucker
If you ask someone to go to bed and they say no, you should assume that no means no.
But, if you ask someone to marry, no can mean never, or it could mean maybe later, or it could mean I'm just not ready yet.
When I first met my wife - of 19 plus years now - she had been divorced for 9 years following two short marriages of about 2 years each.
I knew immediately that she was the one woman that I desired to marry. So, I slowly pursued her for over two years.
After about a year, I asked her to marry me, and she said no, but we remained friends. After about six months mire, I asked her again, and was again told no. As before, we stayed friends.
After about another six months, I asked her again and she said yes.
She has told me since then, that having been divorced twice and single for 9 years, she was not sure that she wanted to be married again. She said that knowing me for two years - and knowing my love for her and my interest in her - convinced her that she did want to be married.
We both agree that we love each other more than anyone else, and that being married brings more joy and intensity to our lives than anything else.
If my response to her first no - or to her second no - had been, "oh well, I'll see you around", both of our lives would have been immeasurably reduced.
Sometimes, no just means not yet. Be attentive and patient and persistent, but not pushy.
I am totally in love with my wife!
Quakertrucker
NiftyWhite · 46-50, F
@Quakertrucker beautiful testimony