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Age gap relationships...

My mother-in-law married a guy my husband's age... She is in her 60s he in his 30s. That's a 30 year difference. I am all for finding love... but even I think more than 15 years is a bit extreme. What do you think?

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SW-User

There's 21 years between my husband and I. We're very happy and have been married for 16 years now. I'm younger than he is and I don't regret a thing. Hopefully your mother in law knows what she is doing and it really is the real deal. You can't do anything other than be there to support her either way ❤️

UpForItNow · 22-25, F

@SW-User My first wife was 11yrs older than me, my second 11yrs younger. Younger is better.

Snowvixen

@SW-User It's weird though when they wanted my spouse and me to refer to him as dad... and they wanted my kids to call him grandpa. 😯

SW-User

@Snowvixen Well he is a step grandpa. My husband has a daughter from his first marriage (I'm his third wife) who has children. My husband is now estranged from her and bitter because she has never recognised our marriage, our adopted children (she says because they are not blood) or allowed me to have anything to do with her kids. I don't see a problem with extra grandparents or uncles who will nurture and make them feel loved, our children have benefitted hugely from a large network of extended family and friends who love and nurture them. I hope you get this sorted, it gets so painful and messy if you're not careful X

longhairedcougar · 51-55, F

Age gap is fun ❤️💋

Rocky101 · 51-55, M

@longhairedcougar what’s the biggest age gap relationship you had

longhairedcougar · 51-55, F

@Rocky101 he was 19 when i was 40+

Yaz69 · 36-40, M

@longhairedcougar I find age gap difference is fun too. But i like woman older then me

DaddyP · 61-69, M

Why should anyone be limited by what others think is appropriate or not. It should be X year at most… why? Because you understand the people involved and that’s the right number for them? Please.

As someone wise once said “The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire, not things we fear.”

bluesmanmark · 46-50, M

While I'm firmly in the age range you mention as a acceptable upper limit, (I'm 45 & my wife is 57, 12 years older than me), I also dont see an issue with the age gap between your M-I-L & her new husband. It may be a larger gap than I'd be into, but as long as they love each other & are happy together, that's what matters, not the age difference.

By the same token, 10-11 years ago, I'd have never thought of dating a woman 12 years older than me, but I'm glad I did. 10 years together so far, 9 of them married to each other, & still very happy together, & deeply in love with each other.

Magnolia21 · 22-25, F

Personally, I think there is a limit. 10 years? That's okay as long as both are mature. 20? Probably more of a money/desperation thing.

GovanDUNNY · M

@Magnolia21 so theres no chance for me babe

Andromedanian · 22-25, M

@Magnolia21 I dated way over that limit and it all went well

Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

@Magnolia21 what about 11 years? Pushing it?

Riverman2 · 56-60, M

Each person has to assess that for themselves. Personally, I would look at the long term. It may seem ok now but what about in 20 years, 80 and 50?

Ruth82 · 41-45, F

I have a friend who is 48 and his wife is 73. Theyve been together and married for about 25 years now. My first boyfreind at 17 was 32.

IM5688 · 61-69, M

While age is just a number, (so they say,) there is also something to be said for maturity and experience.
I am 67. Sometimes I feel like I'm 80 and other times I feel like 30. While I am surely attracted to much younger women, I personally would draw the line, at +5 to +7 years older and -10 to -15 younger than for myself.

GovanDUNNY · M

@IM5688 Theres life in the old dog yet

Andromedanian · 22-25, M

I've dated women up to 54 and I was 19. Believe it or not, for as long as it lasted there was no conflict, there was mutual support and all that

PhoenixPhail · M

I think it's a totally personal thing. If a 20-year-old wants to be with a 90-year-old, that's fine with me. It's their life. To each, their own.

in10RjFox · M

Nothing wrong in two lonely souls getting married irrespective of the age gap. Many marriages are ratified living in relationship.

Pretzel · 61-69, M

meh
they have to deal with each other. if they're happy - let them be

ElRengo · 70-79, M

I wouldn´t advise in favour of age gaps across generations.
Besides what just IMO are extremes, some relationships can work with important age differences,
But as there are also other factors that may make relationships fail, I wouldn´t add another one if can be avoided.

SW-User

Lol yeah that's way too much

NerdyPotato · M

I think it could work when you're younger, but their current ages are about the limit. Once one gets ready to retire and the other hardly started his career or when one needs the care of an elderly home the partner isn't allowed in yet for 30 years, then it becomes problematic.

SW-User

Yes 30 years age difference too much. 10 years or even 8 years plus is a lot. But I would say it’s okay until the age gap becomes more than 18-20 years as by then you’re literally old enough to be their parent.