I Abusive Relationships

The thing is my husband thinks that as long as he isn't hitting me he isn't being abusive. I have been going to weekly therapy for the last three years assuming that the fault was all mine, that a concussion I got several years ago is changing my behavior and that I need help. I probably do still need help but lately, my therapist has been asking me to attend domestic violence meetings and I had no idea that (other than the physical abuse) my husband has every single "criteria" for the other forms of abuse. Some of the examples used are exact sentences he will say and my reactions are the same reactions. I have a two year old daughter who adores her daddy and I feel trapped.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

firefall · 61-69, M

For her sake, as well as your own, get out of there, please. She will gradually absorb the lesson that this is how she should be treated, too.

And yes, hitting is usually the easiest bit of abuse to identify, and the least damaging (at least til it escalates too far). One of the prime lessons that abusers pick up quickly, is how to make your target take responsibility for the interaction, not blame the abuser :(