If abusers were abusive all the time they wouldn't get away with it.

We gotta take it easy on people who have been through abuse. Stop fucking blaming them like their minds weren't broken long before their hearts were. Be there for them when they relive the nightmares and cry. Help them heal. Hug them. Show them safety and consistent care. It's okay for people to do that for each other. Because yes, people can be victims. VICTIMS and idgaf if you don't like the word. It's real even if it's not real for you. And it's okay to help.

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MrBlueGuy

Abuse is so horrible because it radiates outwards and be passed down generationally...So many abusers were victims of abuse themselves and never tried to get help...if someone is actually reaching out for help at the very least they should be listened to and hugged...it's someone trying to stop the cycle and that's honestly one of the most amazing things anyone can do

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@MrBlueGuy I think it's okay to pull someone out of that situation too, to just straight up help them and show them what real kindness is.

To see what I've seen lately helps heal some generational abuse I've been through.

ForeverOnMyGuard · 26-30, F

Somone who leaves domestic violence is a survivor, because the ones who never left for good are dead. The abusers break their victims down until there is nothing left and they feel they don't deserve to live.

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ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@uncalled4 yes this is exactly what I mean. It's just good enough to stay and feel attached or responsible and even feel sorry for them as they hurt you. What they put you through is not often easy to see if you are a loyal understanding person or if it's family you grew up with and didn't know. I just wish for people to be helped and receive compassion because the bullies will never stop.

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

@ScreamingFox BOTH of my fiancee's parents displayed considerably narcissistic behavior. I was shocked to find out that THEY DO MARRY EACH OTHER. While it initially makes no sense on paper, in a situation like parenting, they keep the kids close and behave as each other's "flying monkeys", bullies no better than you find at school. Even worse, in fact, because if a narc knows your weakness, they will kick you there relentlessly. No boundaries. And while I wish death on no one, one being gone is, frankly, better.

DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F

I have 100% stopped hoping to be shown any kindness

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@DearAmbellina2113 same. The only thing I trust is that I'm alone

DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F

@ScreamingFox me too

Younameit · F

Unfortunately it’s a cycle of love bombing and abuse

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@Younameit it's so hard to understand what's real after awhile

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