Domestic abuse and violence
Do most perpetrators have a personality disorder or mental illness
can mental illness cause violence
or is it a seprate issue?
can mental illness cause violence
or is it a seprate issue?
31-35, M
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Queendragonfly · 31-35, F
[quote]Do most perpetrators have a personality disorder or mental illness
[/quote]
Yes.
"[i]Research has indicated that abusive personalities are often linked to mental health issues such as:
Anxiety
Depression
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Other personality disorders
Addressing mental health concerns is of great importance, as it can help mitigate the risks associated with abusive behavior."[/i]
I have met many abusive people and they all have one thing in common. [b]Trauma[/b]. Neglecting/ abusive parents. Mental disorders and they lack the ability to react appropriately. So they react impulsive and aggressive and if they deny themselves proper help they become abusive and dangerous to themselves and others.
My first teen boyfriend was a rapist. He had a neglecting dad who's only love for him was send some money now and then. His mom was psycho in some obsessive way I don't know the disorder name for but she freaked me out and we avoided her as much as possible. His only friends were gangs who beat up others and acted tough. His big brother a fat incel who had no respect for women. I suspected someone raped him too. He had some weird fears of showing his butt etc. He had no chance to become a normal person with these fucked conditions already since childhood. He cut himself in front of me when I dumped him. I knew without me his life was over. But he wasn't my responsibility. And I was done being his punching bag.
My last ex who abused me physically. Was the black sheep in the family. He took all the beats from his dad anytime there was family drama. To be beat up for no reason was his everyday life before and after school. He rebelled against them by doing crimes and joining gangs as older with his brother. He was threatened by gun point a few times and went to prison for false rape accusation from a girlfriend he opened up to. He was really traumatized by it and it made him hate society even more. Another example of someone who had no chance to become a good person or be able to open his heart again. He tried to take his life several times as it's easier than seeking help. That's the reality for some. He was probably a narcissist and to blow the image of them being perfect. Narcissists are really wounded people. So wounded they twist their world image and self image to not be destroyed.
(I'm not saying they had any right to lay hands on me, I'm simply aware of how environments and psychology impacts a person and I can seperate the two)
My current partner dated a girl diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder. She would wake him up by pouring trash over his head in the bed. Just for being upset he didn't take out the trash or some stupid shit. He has scars from her physical abuse on him. He finally dumped her and then he found out she killed herself and had laid dead in two weeks in her apartment.
I have tons , hundreds of stories showing that mental illness can in worst case scenarios make someone the perpetrator.
Now you may ask if after all this it made me abusive. Yes. I became abusive and dangerous. I met my current partner and I realised that I was scaring him and myself. Once in a relationship I started showing such defence behaviour and I had enormous agressive outbursts that I hated and was so ashamed of. It made the relationship so rocky. Suddenly I was the bad person.
I went from my teen diagnosis PTSD to CPTSD. In therapy for 2 years. Then pause two years. I'm much better now and my current therapy is focusing on my shame feelings and self harm. And how to be able handling my feelings healthy. I still have sudden anger but it's more like a little snap that I fast can catch up on and regulate. My "Window of tolerance" significantly improved in my last therapy.
The only time abuse is made without mental illness I think, is the abuse from a psychopath. They are born different and they see everything different and thus don't live with any morals. This makes them do illegal abusive things without flinching. Some can be raised polite and keep away from hurting others while some are often secretly torturing animals, serial killers or rapists.
[/quote]
Yes.
"[i]Research has indicated that abusive personalities are often linked to mental health issues such as:
Anxiety
Depression
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Other personality disorders
Addressing mental health concerns is of great importance, as it can help mitigate the risks associated with abusive behavior."[/i]
I have met many abusive people and they all have one thing in common. [b]Trauma[/b]. Neglecting/ abusive parents. Mental disorders and they lack the ability to react appropriately. So they react impulsive and aggressive and if they deny themselves proper help they become abusive and dangerous to themselves and others.
My first teen boyfriend was a rapist. He had a neglecting dad who's only love for him was send some money now and then. His mom was psycho in some obsessive way I don't know the disorder name for but she freaked me out and we avoided her as much as possible. His only friends were gangs who beat up others and acted tough. His big brother a fat incel who had no respect for women. I suspected someone raped him too. He had some weird fears of showing his butt etc. He had no chance to become a normal person with these fucked conditions already since childhood. He cut himself in front of me when I dumped him. I knew without me his life was over. But he wasn't my responsibility. And I was done being his punching bag.
My last ex who abused me physically. Was the black sheep in the family. He took all the beats from his dad anytime there was family drama. To be beat up for no reason was his everyday life before and after school. He rebelled against them by doing crimes and joining gangs as older with his brother. He was threatened by gun point a few times and went to prison for false rape accusation from a girlfriend he opened up to. He was really traumatized by it and it made him hate society even more. Another example of someone who had no chance to become a good person or be able to open his heart again. He tried to take his life several times as it's easier than seeking help. That's the reality for some. He was probably a narcissist and to blow the image of them being perfect. Narcissists are really wounded people. So wounded they twist their world image and self image to not be destroyed.
(I'm not saying they had any right to lay hands on me, I'm simply aware of how environments and psychology impacts a person and I can seperate the two)
My current partner dated a girl diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder. She would wake him up by pouring trash over his head in the bed. Just for being upset he didn't take out the trash or some stupid shit. He has scars from her physical abuse on him. He finally dumped her and then he found out she killed herself and had laid dead in two weeks in her apartment.
I have tons , hundreds of stories showing that mental illness can in worst case scenarios make someone the perpetrator.
Now you may ask if after all this it made me abusive. Yes. I became abusive and dangerous. I met my current partner and I realised that I was scaring him and myself. Once in a relationship I started showing such defence behaviour and I had enormous agressive outbursts that I hated and was so ashamed of. It made the relationship so rocky. Suddenly I was the bad person.
I went from my teen diagnosis PTSD to CPTSD. In therapy for 2 years. Then pause two years. I'm much better now and my current therapy is focusing on my shame feelings and self harm. And how to be able handling my feelings healthy. I still have sudden anger but it's more like a little snap that I fast can catch up on and regulate. My "Window of tolerance" significantly improved in my last therapy.
The only time abuse is made without mental illness I think, is the abuse from a psychopath. They are born different and they see everything different and thus don't live with any morals. This makes them do illegal abusive things without flinching. Some can be raised polite and keep away from hurting others while some are often secretly torturing animals, serial killers or rapists.
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Scribbles · 36-40, F
@Queendragonfly ok, you're 100 percent right there. 😳 Thanks for calling me out, it's clearly not taking much to convince me.
Now, I feel like all my comments have just been gut reactions, part defense mechanisms, and mostly old facts from my uni days that I largely accepted it was fact. And I feel a bit embarressed for not thinking deeper about it. 🫤 I'm going to go have a think and do some more research.
Now, I feel like all my comments have just been gut reactions, part defense mechanisms, and mostly old facts from my uni days that I largely accepted it was fact. And I feel a bit embarressed for not thinking deeper about it. 🫤 I'm going to go have a think and do some more research.
Queendragonfly · 31-35, F
@Scribbles Hey don't worry about me ❤️ I wouldn't talk about it unless it felt [b]ok[/b].
Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed on my account, I mean, how would you be able to know something like this unless you learned lt from someone? Or had a reason to? It's ok to learn this right now. I learn things every day. What matters is you're willing to learn. Not how fast it happens.
I had a reason to know about this because I wanted to understand what makes people hurt others. I and why they hurt me. Because I didn't buy "They're evil/ possessed by demons" or other excuses.
And I've always had an interest for human behaviour and psychology. I've studied psychology class , twice. One in highschool and one after.
Also there's nothing wrong with gut reactions we all have them. It's human and normal.
Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed on my account, I mean, how would you be able to know something like this unless you learned lt from someone? Or had a reason to? It's ok to learn this right now. I learn things every day. What matters is you're willing to learn. Not how fast it happens.
I had a reason to know about this because I wanted to understand what makes people hurt others. I and why they hurt me. Because I didn't buy "They're evil/ possessed by demons" or other excuses.
And I've always had an interest for human behaviour and psychology. I've studied psychology class , twice. One in highschool and one after.
Also there's nothing wrong with gut reactions we all have them. It's human and normal.
Scribbles · 36-40, F
@Queendragonfly I always wanted to understand too, I took several human psychology classes and talked alot of psychology with a professor who spent 35 years doing therapy in the criminal justice system. So violence was not unusual, but he always agreed that mental illness was not a cause of violence.
I used to read APA articles all the time too, to keep up on interesting bits of information.
It's interesting that we ended having two different perspectives on parts of it
From a clinical standpoint, my prof always told me and the textbooks always made it clear too....to separate abuse as a learned behavior (largely biologic-environmental) that one has control of...and is different from from mental illness which is a collection of symptoms that one may not always have control of. People can feel irritable, anxious, angry, sad, etc without being abusive.
This is very important in treating a person and dealing with behaviors. Because you have to hold violent and abuse people responsible for their behaviors at the same time as treating them.
So I guess that's why it sticks with me as important and making the distinction. I think it is still correct from that standpoint.
But it doesn't address what you were talking about.
Because you aren't wrong about some personality disorders being more linked to violence then others.
Or that trauma can play a part. Trauma can be so many things, but yeah unresolved mental health needs and dangerous patterns of thoughts are a boiling pot. Therapy can address the first, but often struggles with the second. If the central causes of abusiveness in someone is thoughts of entitlement, coercive control, disrespect, superiority, selfishness, or victim blaming. Then that is the problem. The abusive behavior and attitude is the problem more then a wound of insecurity for example. Idk.
During times of crisis, anyone can be at an increased risk for acting out violently or abusively because they may have a lower tolerance for frustrations when stressed. For some people, this tolerance can drop so low that they are less able to control their behaviors. It is important to distinguish between a diagnosable mental illness and someone with untreated mental health needs and someone with a harmful value system (for example) Because not every violent criminal out there is diagnosed with mental illness. But they may have still suffered from other factors that increased the risk of perpetrating violence or abuse.
After some research there is a marked increase in behavior in person's with mental illness if other factors were involved such as substance abuse, were abused themselves, have no support system, if they refuse therapy/treatment or medication. But the same can be said for persons not diagnosed with a mental illness, that they are more likely to be violent given those stressors in life too.
That being said there are are some holes of information out there, even when every reputable psychology association I could Google
today directly says that it is a myth that mentally ill people are more likely to be a perpetrator...even if they then talks about factors that do matter when it comes to violence: like substance abuse, untreated mental illness that elevates the percentage greatly etc.
So, yeah more to learn I guess.
Thanks for sharing what you know. I respect it. I don't 100 percent agree with you. But I agree on like 90 percent, and on the important stuff. And I also think I have more to learn.. And that's ok.
I used to read APA articles all the time too, to keep up on interesting bits of information.
It's interesting that we ended having two different perspectives on parts of it
From a clinical standpoint, my prof always told me and the textbooks always made it clear too....to separate abuse as a learned behavior (largely biologic-environmental) that one has control of...and is different from from mental illness which is a collection of symptoms that one may not always have control of. People can feel irritable, anxious, angry, sad, etc without being abusive.
This is very important in treating a person and dealing with behaviors. Because you have to hold violent and abuse people responsible for their behaviors at the same time as treating them.
So I guess that's why it sticks with me as important and making the distinction. I think it is still correct from that standpoint.
But it doesn't address what you were talking about.
Because you aren't wrong about some personality disorders being more linked to violence then others.
Or that trauma can play a part. Trauma can be so many things, but yeah unresolved mental health needs and dangerous patterns of thoughts are a boiling pot. Therapy can address the first, but often struggles with the second. If the central causes of abusiveness in someone is thoughts of entitlement, coercive control, disrespect, superiority, selfishness, or victim blaming. Then that is the problem. The abusive behavior and attitude is the problem more then a wound of insecurity for example. Idk.
During times of crisis, anyone can be at an increased risk for acting out violently or abusively because they may have a lower tolerance for frustrations when stressed. For some people, this tolerance can drop so low that they are less able to control their behaviors. It is important to distinguish between a diagnosable mental illness and someone with untreated mental health needs and someone with a harmful value system (for example) Because not every violent criminal out there is diagnosed with mental illness. But they may have still suffered from other factors that increased the risk of perpetrating violence or abuse.
After some research there is a marked increase in behavior in person's with mental illness if other factors were involved such as substance abuse, were abused themselves, have no support system, if they refuse therapy/treatment or medication. But the same can be said for persons not diagnosed with a mental illness, that they are more likely to be violent given those stressors in life too.
That being said there are are some holes of information out there, even when every reputable psychology association I could Google
today directly says that it is a myth that mentally ill people are more likely to be a perpetrator...even if they then talks about factors that do matter when it comes to violence: like substance abuse, untreated mental illness that elevates the percentage greatly etc.
So, yeah more to learn I guess.
Thanks for sharing what you know. I respect it. I don't 100 percent agree with you. But I agree on like 90 percent, and on the important stuff. And I also think I have more to learn.. And that's ok.
Scribbles · 36-40, F
Fact: people with mental illness are MORE likely to become a victim of abuse or violence then a perpetrator.
Most perpetrators of abuse and violence show no symptoms of mental illness.
The fact of the matter, is that anyone can be dangerous. It comes down to if they have the means and will to do so. People who are more desperate and see violence and abuse as an answer are the ones most likely to resort to such options. It has nothing to do with mental Illness.
Most perpetrators of abuse and violence show no symptoms of mental illness.
The fact of the matter, is that anyone can be dangerous. It comes down to if they have the means and will to do so. People who are more desperate and see violence and abuse as an answer are the ones most likely to resort to such options. It has nothing to do with mental Illness.
Scribbles · 36-40, F
@SW-User I'm sorry about your family. That must have been very hard. :/
SW-User
Scribbles · 36-40, F
@SW-User not normal at all. I was very traumatized for a long time. It was horrifying.
But my brothers actions stemmed from the fact that he had a lot of anger and frustration, and he learned it was acceptable to force and bully people to do what he wanted from others around him, and he pushed further and further and got more angry and insecure and went to further extremes. He was afraid of consequences and learned to lie and gaslight very well. His mental illness wasn't a factor until he was already molesting and beating me up. Sure it made things worse, but it wasn't the cause.
Yes of course such behavior sounds mad (because it is immoral and harmful). But it is not a diagnosable mental illness to be angry and hurt people. It is not a diagnosable mental illness to bully. It is not a diagnosable.mental illness to molest or rape.
But my brothers actions stemmed from the fact that he had a lot of anger and frustration, and he learned it was acceptable to force and bully people to do what he wanted from others around him, and he pushed further and further and got more angry and insecure and went to further extremes. He was afraid of consequences and learned to lie and gaslight very well. His mental illness wasn't a factor until he was already molesting and beating me up. Sure it made things worse, but it wasn't the cause.
Yes of course such behavior sounds mad (because it is immoral and harmful). But it is not a diagnosable mental illness to be angry and hurt people. It is not a diagnosable mental illness to bully. It is not a diagnosable.mental illness to molest or rape.
SW-User
I think it's a separate issue, because frequently mentally ill people are vulnerable and on the receiving end of abuse. Prison psychologists who have interviewed violent criminals have stated that many of them show no symptoms of any known mental illness.
lulove · 18-21, F
I don’t think all of them have personality disorders/mental illness. It can contribute to domestic violence for sure, but it’s a little problematic to associate mental illness with abusers.
Ontheroad · M
Yep and really, a personality disorder is just another mental illness/disorder. If I'm not mistaken, borderline personality disorder is the most common among abusers.
Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
I think much of domestic violence is probably due to frustration rather than any diagnosable illness.
FlowersNButterflies · 61-69, F
It can also be brain damage. Lesions in certain areas can warp people.
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