I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

I had a boyfriend when I was young who did that. His name was Dale R. He kept telling me how stupid and ugly I was.

However, when I talked about leaving him, he got angry and threatened to hurt me if I left.

I asked him why he wanted to keep me around if I was so awful. His answer: "Because I PITY you. You're so DUMB that if I ever put you put on the streets, you'd be dead in 20 minutes!!!"

That was 19 minutes,ago....in 1965.
It must be 19 minutes since I left Dale because I'm not dead yet!

It's better to have loved and lost than lived with a douchebag the rest of your life.

It's rather insidious isn't it? I would never tell a woman she couldn't do better because it's just insulting if you really think about it.

It certainly was @Manifestoofthephoenix, I really hope you never do that. That guy was a total douchebag, he probably is still xD

Glad you saw the light and escaped from the jerk. Give yourself credit for being wise and strong.

Yeah. You usually feel that way after a breakup with a manipulative guy. You feel like a puzzlr with a piece missing and no othe piece can fix your contorted puzzle. But when the right guy comes along it is like nothing else matters. And he is that missing piece. It just takes time and people to vent to.

smart move to dumped him.

@thoughlesslythinking
Well, that was a long time ago. But when I broke up with him I felt soo lonely. I believed for a second that I made a stupid decision and that I was going to die alone.

CrazyCatLady narcissists do that to control people. They are not at all bothered by hurting your feelings, because they don't have feelings!

@1961dave Yes! I agree, It's pretty much the only bad experience I've had when speaking about relationships, but it was horrible.

CrazyCatLady, they're just horrible people, it never get's better with them. It's a good thing you're out of it!

I've heard men say that, because that's too often their experience---women are drawn to abusers. You would think that a man stupid enough to give voice to that sentiment wouldn't be able to get a date in the first place. Kudos for getting away from that.

@greenmountaingal Thank you for sharing. Sometimes we are just so afraid to notice when things are wrong. We are all scared of lonelinesss, but when you find out there are people around (family, friends, etc.) that support you, makes it easier. And also when you read all these stories from people who got over situations like this. I wish SW existed when I was younger.

Good for you. Don't let people manipulate you.

@uncalled4 He told me women were like bubble gum, the more you step on them, the more they stick to you.

Now how do you feel once that toxic man is out of your life?

That's typical narcissist behavior.

Good for you. :)

Which phrase?