Interesting conversations about relationships
I did a work trip over two days with another guy from my work (took a train to a rural site one day, brought it back loaded the next day) and we were talking about our dating and relationship situations and things around parenting etc. during part of the run back yesterday.
He seemed really surprised (almost shocked) that I've chosen to not pursue dating and new relationships because of lots of poor and negative experiences set against my focus of my almost 9 y/o daughter and her needs from me as a father. I told him about my experiences with her mum and what I ended up choosing to do in terms of leaving her mum, the struggles around sorting out parenting arrangements, the different financial situations of me vs her mum, and views about dating and relationships.
He is quite a lot younger than me (30's) with a partner, a son who's a few yrs old, and another baby on the way. I guess when you're in your 30's you don't really think about what it's like to not have romantic connections unless you have really bad experiences, and most people in their 20's and 30's tend to have a close circle of social friends perhaps involving their romantic partner(s), families, and related networks.
I have noticed that guys with partners who are a lot younger seem to think it's odd that at older guy chooses to remain single because of difficulties around 'processing' the realm of dating, relationships, etc.
Yet guys who are older (40's and esp 50's where I am) are more understanding almost because it's a given they my age range is more likely to have have a wider range of dating and relationship experiences including break-ups and social meltdowns, etc. where coping with trying to find a new partner seems overwhelmingly difficult and leads to just not wanting to try anymore.
How do you see the differences between younger and older people in terms of their perspectives on relationships?
He seemed really surprised (almost shocked) that I've chosen to not pursue dating and new relationships because of lots of poor and negative experiences set against my focus of my almost 9 y/o daughter and her needs from me as a father. I told him about my experiences with her mum and what I ended up choosing to do in terms of leaving her mum, the struggles around sorting out parenting arrangements, the different financial situations of me vs her mum, and views about dating and relationships.
He is quite a lot younger than me (30's) with a partner, a son who's a few yrs old, and another baby on the way. I guess when you're in your 30's you don't really think about what it's like to not have romantic connections unless you have really bad experiences, and most people in their 20's and 30's tend to have a close circle of social friends perhaps involving their romantic partner(s), families, and related networks.
I have noticed that guys with partners who are a lot younger seem to think it's odd that at older guy chooses to remain single because of difficulties around 'processing' the realm of dating, relationships, etc.
Yet guys who are older (40's and esp 50's where I am) are more understanding almost because it's a given they my age range is more likely to have have a wider range of dating and relationship experiences including break-ups and social meltdowns, etc. where coping with trying to find a new partner seems overwhelmingly difficult and leads to just not wanting to try anymore.
How do you see the differences between younger and older people in terms of their perspectives on relationships?
