After 15 years together I'm on my own

It was magical for a few years and then it wasn't. And then it was aweful. We bounced back a bit and I was hopeful for a few years, but this last year was too much. We couldn't move past the things that happened. Even though we both knew the end was coming it's still so gutting. I hate the grief that comes from saying goodbye even though I KNOW this is for the best for both of us. Today makes 2 weeks without him. I've only embarrassed myself with a few text messages but mostly kept to myself for sanity sake.