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So here's some tea: shared with one of my girl friends about the guy I want to tie the knot with

She basically said some stuff that I found confusing.... She asked me "did you split the bills when you guys were dating?"
I told her we took turns because I can't have someone paying for me all the time.
She said "girl, that was a mistake, don't spoil their habits"
I didn't understand what she meant and I asked her to elaborate. She said, "men will not acknowledge or respect you more for it. A man should never let you spend a penny when you guys go out. I've been there, given elaborate gifts, paid for meals, and it never works out, only spoils them. A man should be willing to take 100% responsibility of you and your finances, no matter how much you earn. This gives them the wrong message."

I still don't get it tbh. But also I'm very naive. I didn't ask her further bcz I didn't want to sound slow. What does she mean though
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Iwillwait · M
This is a mixed message for sure for you to digest.

Most men will pay for the meals etc. However there is a newer concept that whom ever does the inviting pays the tab, I have seen this too. I have also seen where a female can have feelings of being downgraded for not being allowed to "Treat," or pay the Tabs.

This issue here is "Expectations." There should bever be "Expectations," only "Communications," this will water and nuture the relationship.