This isn't important

I've been feeling a bit isolated and lonely for the past couple of days at least. I think it's tied to her not being around as much as she usually is, since it's illness season in America and she's both sick and having to cover insane amounts at work. I don't blame her for that, but it's left me feeling a bit alone. My love for her hasn't changed and I truly doubt her love for me has either - rationally I know it hasn't, but the reduced communication has given my depression a bit of a boost, and it's doing its insidious thing.

Idk. I'll be fine, I always am. I am worried she's spread way too thin though. I'm doing what I can to support her, but I'm not sure it's going to be enough. Definitely worried she'll burn out extremely hard and that her body will force her to rest. Don't want her hurting herself (not in a self harm sort of way but in a doing too much way).

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rawandauthentic · 46-50, F

I feel you. I'm doing long distance and it kinda sucks. Especially the time difference. The depression gets me too when he's not as available.

It helps if I distract myself with ither things and I constantly give myself little pep talks and reminders that he feels the same way as I do and he can't switch off his feelings, just as much as I cant switch off mine.

So even if we havent had much talk time or texting, the love is still there. I'm sure she feels the same about you too. Big positive is you know exactly what is happening with her ie she's sick and working more. Communication is so important and seems like you have that.

KiwiDan · 31-35, M

@rawandauthentic we do have it. I think I just got used to it being a certain way then when it slowed down I couldn't adjust

rawandauthentic · 46-50, F

@KiwiDan I totally get it. I will give you the tip my therapist gave me today. She said not to put all my eggs in one basket. So basically she was saying to find other things that interest me and give me joy and can take up some of that spare time I have now that he is not around as much. It doesn't change the relationship or the love, it just gives you stuff to do outside of it, so you're looking at her as your love and not your crutch to get you through your depression etc. I tend to be like that and can invest all of me into someone so that it consumes me, so I'm trying to unlearn that while still giving all my love.

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