As a guy my "staying power" is due to to either mental control or physical control or a combination of the two, the keyword being control, i.e being aware of how my body is reacting in the moment during intercourse and being in touch with my body's sensations and reactions and my level of excitment.
Which helped me gauge how far or near i was to orgasm. Ive never lasted very long if i lost myself in the moment and just let the motions take me( the penis is designed to reach orgasm and doesnt have a concept of time or consideration for its vagina partner)
A more physical game of control involved paying attention to my sensitivity during the act and either slowing down or stopping for a bit and doing something else oral, fingering etc(if i didnt want to orgasm too soon)
A more mental game involved almost meditating during sex, concentrating on my breathing etc. To reach a mental space of detachment, detaching mentally so that i didnt get lost in the moment
So sex has lasted anything between 7 to 30min. The times i was most likely to finish too soon was when i had not had sex in a while and got lost in the moment "wow im actually having sex again woohoo!....aaaand i'm done... Whaap.
Ive also tried tantric sex which is the longest ive lasted (40 min) and it was pretty much a meditation with very slow calculated movements and deep breathing and visialisations etc, my partner almost fell asleep at the end it was more relaxing than exciting, lol.
