Huge fight, lost
I know people on here have advised me to leave and I don’t want to just give up. So I’m going to explain our latest argument. I called my fiancé today to discuss an issue. In about a year, we’re planning to live together finally. I made the suggestion to live where I do in America because that is our goal. Hence, the green card and all that will have to happen anyway.
My fiance is from England and wants me to live there a year so we can save and move back to America. Financially, I don’t see how it’s responsible and I’ve posed that and immediately had a heated argument for it. I was told “you don’t love me,” and “you don’t want to be here with me yet I have to live there forever.”
Okay more information: my fiancé is much older than me. I’ve waited years to be together waiting for my fiancés mom to pass. I know that sounds awful but that is our situation. The mom is abusive can’t know I exist and she has dementia and is between us being together right now.
But I’ve waited. And after that, my fiancé won’t have family in England. Therefore, I feel living here which we agreed on would make more sense. Because I do have ties.
I’m fine living in England a year. All I said is that is all it will be and I’m asking why exactly this is the great plan. All my fiancé says is this: “I have a house with a great contract where I pay little rent.” Ok but we can find something for maybe $200 more a month and I won’t have to pay $1,000s to move there. My fiance doesn’t want to live here on cheap rent because of the fact people own guns.
Now I’m being ignored. I spoke to a family member about it and she said “if you were truly in love you’d drop everything.” And that hit me hard because I’m at this point where what does this mean I’m not truly in love? Does being financially responsible mean you’re not in love?
I don’t know exactly what is so bad about what I said. I did say that post a year, I’ll be anxious to leave because my computer that was specifically built will be here, my dog will be here, my job, I’d be giving up for it. So I was mocked for my job and for saying a computer is more important. I’m not exactly sure what I’ve done wrong so please enlighten me.
My fiance is from England and wants me to live there a year so we can save and move back to America. Financially, I don’t see how it’s responsible and I’ve posed that and immediately had a heated argument for it. I was told “you don’t love me,” and “you don’t want to be here with me yet I have to live there forever.”
Okay more information: my fiancé is much older than me. I’ve waited years to be together waiting for my fiancés mom to pass. I know that sounds awful but that is our situation. The mom is abusive can’t know I exist and she has dementia and is between us being together right now.
But I’ve waited. And after that, my fiancé won’t have family in England. Therefore, I feel living here which we agreed on would make more sense. Because I do have ties.
I’m fine living in England a year. All I said is that is all it will be and I’m asking why exactly this is the great plan. All my fiancé says is this: “I have a house with a great contract where I pay little rent.” Ok but we can find something for maybe $200 more a month and I won’t have to pay $1,000s to move there. My fiance doesn’t want to live here on cheap rent because of the fact people own guns.
Now I’m being ignored. I spoke to a family member about it and she said “if you were truly in love you’d drop everything.” And that hit me hard because I’m at this point where what does this mean I’m not truly in love? Does being financially responsible mean you’re not in love?
I don’t know exactly what is so bad about what I said. I did say that post a year, I’ll be anxious to leave because my computer that was specifically built will be here, my dog will be here, my job, I’d be giving up for it. So I was mocked for my job and for saying a computer is more important. I’m not exactly sure what I’ve done wrong so please enlighten me.
26-30, M