Husband likes to dancing with me, to see if women flirt with him

My husband of 25 years just recently informed me that when we go dancing, he doesn’t particularly loves to dance with me but he likes to see if other women check him out.
To hear this, broke my heart. I honestly thought that it was a bonding activity for him as well. Dancing with him made me feel loved and desired.
Now, I do not feel like going dancing with my husband ever again. Which is a shame since we are both ok dancers.
Anyone has any advice or a similar experience?

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REMsleep · 41-45, F

Depending on context that statement from him sounds careless and ignorant and selfish.
Is this a pattern from him? If so you have larger issues. If he is just being an idiot and is generally a good caring husband then its possible that he spoke stupidly and didn't mean it in the way that it sounds. You know your husband so only you would know. Does he have a wondering eye in general? Midlife crisis?
Either way if he truly insinuated that the main reason to go dancing with you is for other women to check him out he is a jerk for saying that and I don't believe that playing games is wise.

Tell him directly that what he has today might not be what he will have tomorrow so he needs to choose his actions and words carefully from here on out.

Tengo · 46-50, F

@REMsleep I don’t think he is looking for an affair but he definitely has a midlife crisis since a while (and it seems it will never end!!)

ElRengo · 70-79, M

@Tengo
Let me tell you that in the case I´ve told such a thing to the woman I loved (No way!) she would had put me nearer to an end-of-life crisis 🤣.

REMsleep · 41-45, F

@Tengo Well he needs to wake up real quick and being weepy and long suffering won't help. Be firm but lady like. Let him know to snap out of it because he can easily be single and again and there won't be any going back. You are not disposable or to be patiently waiting while he mulls over wanting some freedom.

ElRengo · 70-79, M

@REMsleep
I ultimately agree with you but.......my 1st (2nd and 3rd) reaction would be less polite than yours.
And just saying, I hold no double standards on that scenarios.

REMsleep · 41-45, F

@ElRengo Well Im trying to give the guy a teensy bit of grace out of respect for being in a marriage.

ElRengo · 70-79, M

@REMsleep
As I´ve said and more cos of pragmatics than cos... whatever higher I trend to agree with you.
Have even so some hard 2nd thoughts about.
That is precisely the respect for being in a marriage what he is not having.
And that what IMO (just IMO of course) makes a LTR of value (and so respectable) is what yo do about and not the other way round.
May be I´m personaly biased by my experiences.
When in a relationship I never had eyes for any other woman and neither even been aware of if they gave me that kind of attention.

REMsleep · 41-45, F

@ElRengo Thats admirable and increasingly rare.

ElRengo · 70-79, M

@REMsleep
Thank you so much!
Not a virtue, even so.
There is no special merit in doing things like I want them to be.