Step daughter’s graduation

A few weeks ago it was my step daughter’s graduation and the graduation ball. I was not invited. GF chose to not bring me and her ex did not bring anyone. I am fine with that. Although, nothing was said to me about it. I was simply told. Daughter’s graduation, you won’t see me that weekend. I thought it was weird. I can’t even tell you what my GF wore. I was not talked about anything even as a conversation, excitement for the graduation. Nothing. So this morning I see a picture on my step daughter’s dresser of the graduation. My GF had her wedding bands on. Is that weird??

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LadyBronte · 56-60, F

Yes. OMG. If they're divorced, it is suuuuupeereer weird for her to wear her wedding rings on a weekend she is with her ex and you're not around. That is unacceptable as is the no invitation for you to attend a family event after you've been together for 2 years and have a relationahip with the daughter, and the "you won't see me that weekend" statement.
So. Many. Red. Flags.

Jammy · 51-55, M

@LadyBronte the weekend with her daughter and ex, bothered me less than seeing her with her bands. The no detail for the weekend hurt me.

LadyBronte · 56-60, F

@Jammy I cant imagine wearing an exe's wedding rings ever again. Extremely poor taste and quite frankly shitty.

Jammy · 51-55, M

@LadyBronte I thought of really poor taste as well. She wanted us to buy rings. This is a big deterrent for me

Northwest · M

Is it weird? it depends.

Are you living together? and if so, for how long?

You say this is your GF, so you're not married and she's not your stepdaughter. Did you raise her?

It looks like your GF wants to keep you hidden, and she thinks she's still married.

Jammy · 51-55, M

@Northwest over two years together.Thank you for your insight. Daughter always introduces me as her step daughter. So I feel comfortable saying that.

Northwest · M

@Jammy She may be introducing you as her stepdad, because she may be uncomfortable with saying "mom's boyfriend".

It's however clear, that the issue is with your GF. She is not ready for you to be part of the larger group, and that's whom you should be having the conversation with.

Jammy · 51-55, M

@Northwest agreed on your points

WhateverWorks · 36-40

Initially I wanted to jump on the bandwagon that this has all sorts of red flags about it.

I’m trying to imagine what would possibly be the reason for someone doing something like this. Was it that they were trying to save face at a major social gathering for their daughter?

Jammy · 51-55, M

@WhateverWorks it could be.

Threepio

My take:

1) It is a family thing..... that is why you were not invited.

2) She wore her wedding rings because kids are cruel and her mother didn't want to see her daughter get teased about her parents being divorced......

SW-User

I'd be out of there fast and in a hurry, unless I'm not really putting any money into SDs education and the GF is just for fun times and doesn't live with me.

REMsleep · 41-45, F

Dude is this a joke? I am a staunch advocate for working it out, understanding your partner and marriage but there are 25 waving red flags in your story.
From the little bit of info here I'd say that she has no respect for you. Maybe if I knew more I could try to understand.
If you are not in a serious relationship then I understand not being invited but not the wedding band.

Jammy · 51-55, M

@REMsleep that is how I saw it. No respect.

REMsleep · 41-45, F

@Jammy You are not wrong. I am a woman and I say she has no respect for you nor your relationship. So Sorry that this is what it is.

iamonfire696 · 41-45, F

It’s really weird that she wore her wedding bands. I don’t understand why she would do that?

Jammy · 51-55, M

@iamonfire696 I don’t understand it either. To means it means that a ring means nothing. It’s just jewelry and it’s for the occasion if it makes her look good

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Jammy · 51-55, M

@Stereoguy thank you. I appreciate your response.

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