Relationship OCD

I’ve been in a relationship with my bf for over 5 years. I think I may fear getting emotionally hurt in my relationship and that’s why I might have relationship ocd. What can I do to stop this relationship ocd? I keep having to enter my partners phone passcode but I don’t care about checking anyone on it that much. Would not having access help me learn to not care? I can have Ocd about him downloading an app and forgetting password and changing it but it’s been fine in the past so idk why it’s bothering me now.
Maybe it’s all what you get used to. Advice please.

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itsok · 31-35, F

I haven’t experienced relationship ocd, but I do have ocd. I second what Armin said, please see a specialist. Being able to do your compulsion does not help, it just soothes you short term. Not having access could help, as repeatedly not being able to complete your ritual kinda like desensitizes you, like in ERP therapy (exposure and response prevention) but it’s usually done in a really slow, safe, step by step way.

Can I ask if your partner knows you have this problem?

Fifidog · 26-30, F

@itsok my partner doesn’t know and I feel kind of weird telling him about it because I don’t want him to think that I’m insecure or don’t trust him. I just don’t feel good inside and need to do it (the ritual). In what way does ERP desensitize you? What do you feel when you feel desensitized? How could I solve this in a slow safe steps way?