I’m sad. I’m upset because all I want is to be loved. To be held like I matter as I fall asleep. I’m sad because I’m lonely even though I’m technicaly

not alone. It’s like a rock stuck in the center of my chest. A solid rock that weighs me down. I keep holding my breath…waiting and hoping I’ll get some sort of release.. I’ve tried getting myself to cry, but my eyes are empty… I’ve tried asking for a hug, but the hug was difficult to get and it only lasted a mere second before “it” disappeared back into “its” own business 🙄😒 … I went back to my bed. I tried squeezing a pillow. It’s soft but it doesn’t hug back… it’s just tension, holding this rock in place, holding me down. Release is all I’m asking. I can’t cry. I wish my body would just let me freakin! Why must I be like such a stone!?