What is your story??

I was married and divorced twice chasing the idea that i wanted to be in a relationship to fix my less than favorable self-worth and fear of being alone. I also chased that same theme to a third failed relationship but found a great friendship that now has me 1000 miles away from my family and constantly battling two worlds. One world where i feel good about where i am but always feeling guilty about not being with my family. (No kids just a parent, sibling, and close cousins). Lost parent while i was away which was a horrible way to be woken up with but one i prepared for by dreading everyday the possibility.