Dad, I love you
Yes another post on my dad. Today is the first day in hospice he didn't wake at all. It was just awful listening to him wheezing with every breath. He had pneumonia a couple weeks ago in addition to aggressive cancer. It lingered. It's the first day he didn't hold my hand on his own and say * love you*. 😔
No nurse had been in his room for hours when I arrived because his hand was hanging over the bed, blue😯 I brought it up from near floor,and massaged it until Normal. I was there seven hours, didn't wake up.
I'm bracing myself for the next day or two , where he could pass. I'm not ready fully. I don't want to accept this SHIT CANCER that made him so damn weak, so fatigued and in awful pain. But I'm trying to envision life with his physical being not here. He was the only parent I could ask advice. I'm still going to ask him though.
No nurse had been in his room for hours when I arrived because his hand was hanging over the bed, blue😯 I brought it up from near floor,and massaged it until Normal. I was there seven hours, didn't wake up.
I'm bracing myself for the next day or two , where he could pass. I'm not ready fully. I don't want to accept this SHIT CANCER that made him so damn weak, so fatigued and in awful pain. But I'm trying to envision life with his physical being not here. He was the only parent I could ask advice. I'm still going to ask him though.
