Tell me a bed time story?

Once upon a time..

There live Mr.Lizard, he live in a forest but because he bored he move to live nearby a large lake. Mr.Lizard is running on the outskirts of lake, looks like Mr.Lizard were bored again and looking for activities, he want to try something new and adventurous.

When Mr.Lizard looking at the water surface he see something that emerge from the water. Mr.Lizard surprised, it turns out that the creature is water serpent Mr.Snake.

'Hey, lizard! What are you doing here?'
'I just looking for a new activities, and want to find an adventure" said Mr.Lizard while moving away from Mr.Snake, he fear that Mr.Snake would eat him.
'Why you scare? I won't eat you, i'm full from eating small fish in the lake. By the way, you want fun adventure?'
'Yes, that's right. I like to try something new'
'Have you ever pass across the lake?'
'No, this lake is too broad for me. I can swim a bit, but still scary, i'm worried i'll get drown in the middle of the lake'
'You want to cross it? I will help!'

Mr.Lizard very eager to cross the lake and without thinking he receive Mr.Snake goodwill.
'Okay, so now look for something that can be used as a rope!" Say Mr.Snake
'What for?'
'It's necessary for you to fasten yourself in my body. When we crossed the lake, you will not sunk, I will push you to the surface of water'

Then Mr.Lizard looking for a rope around the outskirts of lake, and he got it. After that Mr.Lizard tied his front legs to the body of Mr.Snake closely. Now they start to swim crossing the lake, but on the middle of lake Mr.Snake start to think to drown Mr.Lizard. Just when Mr.Snake want to execute his plan suddenly his body pulled out from the water. With all his strengh he try to come back into water but it's useless. It turns out Mr.Lizard get caught by Mr.Eagle, and because Mr.Lizard legs tied to Mr.Snake body they both captured and become Mr.Eagle lunch. Yum yum..

Once upon a time there was a man and a woman they were both horny so the guy took the woman to his home and busted his nut all up inside her wet pussyhole.

Once upon a tater tot, Julius Caesar got reeeeeeally thirsty and ordered one of his slave thots to fetch him some water. When she was at the well, she noticed a maaaasagic coin that would make all her dreams come true. So she picked it up and said, “I wish Julius Caesar would become the most nicest, beautiful, perfect man EVAAAAAAR” and she threw it in the well.

When she came back to Mr. C., she immediately noticed that his hair had turned from black into bright white and he was holding a sword and he looked all awesome and shit, and he said, “Fear not m’lady, behold, all the dishes have been washed and my anus has been cleaned by yours truly. You just sit back and watch people bleed to death in the Coliseum.”

After months and months of relaxing and having all the other bitches get jealous of her for nigga C treating her so well, she finally got what was comin’ to her because one of the chicks put TNT in her plate and she EXPLODED and all the food that came out and radioactively created a fat monster that hated everyone who wasn’t like him, and ta-da, now we have Donald Trump for president.

The end.

I'd tell you about the baby bear that got lost in the mountains and the hunter that found her and returned her to her den.

Once upon a time there were 3 bears, Peewee, The Middle One and Hung Long. The 3 bears would visit nice girls just before they went to sleep ...