I have had this beautiful view from my hospital room for a week already and who knows how many more days or weeks to come:
But I can not bring myself to enjoy it. I find nothing to ooo and awe at.
I can't bring myself to look beyond this right here. A box with my little Natalia's keepsake memories (left ) and a box with Sebastian's keepsake memories (right)
Now that it's less painful to sit without pain or feeling like I will pass out I sit at the rocker by the window and hold my babies blankets with their tiny little gowns and hats inside.
I don't know how long I'll be broken and how long it will take me to learn to accept my new path, so if this is too difficult for you to read or don't want to keep seeing things about me or my babies or how difficult this journey will be for me please go ahead and delete me or block me or unfriend me. I understand we all need our space. Right now this is my safe place to grieve, some days I'll be here, some days I won't, some days I'll be happy and others way way low.
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