I Have a Question

Originalme - its not just the heartbreak, its the complication of weaving a relationship, the ups and downs and everything that comes with it and not knowing if someone else will be willing to put in the effort you will. Its easier to push them away.

@Ido I agree, I think we might be scared of someone getting too close because we are afraid of what might potentially happen. For example we might end up heartbroken.

I hope we both will overcome this. It's very troubling when you push people you love/like away but you are constantly missing them, it's like we're deliberately causing ourselves pain.

Also you might feel inadequate for one reason or another, and you don't want to show that to people. This is perfectly normal. This has happened to me as well. I just hid myself in my work and didn't want to talk to any one for awhile.

I'd say this: if it just happens every once in a while, don't worry about it. But if it stops you from being well and if it keeps you from meeting up with friends during some time, try to overcome your reticence and see if you couldn't go out every once in a while and have a good time. You might be surprised.

Noooo it's coz I hope some day I don't push someone away and that could very well be you.

On a serious note,I still appreciate people taking chances on me.

If you come up with an answer let me know. It's on my mind a lot too. I've been the pusher and the pushee.

I think you're correct. I think the ironic thing is we usually push away the people most likely to love us completely and in a healthy manner. Getting relationships right is very tricky. My unscientific conclusion is that there are only maybe 20% of current relationships that are truly healthy and both people truly WANT to be in. People are held together by money, fear of being alone, fear of societal disapproval. etc

Original. LOL. Nooo ...take a chance on me! :D Hahahah!🤗

To prevent them hurting us

Self sabotage, yes.

Yep. Maybe we are scared to get close because like lemon said we are scared to get hurt or maybe we don't think we deserve them.

Human relationships should be easy like animals do. But when the cortex is involved ..... So complex !

@Ido I wanted to say "We're going to be great friends" but now I'm afraid of getting pushed away. 😅

@Ido I love your response! I think you explained it just perfectly! Thank you.

Original. I should know. I'm an expert at pushing people away. :P

@Breathing Ahh, if only we hadn't evolved! 😂

@luck I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking about this. I'm a pusher but I usually push away people I love the most and some people I like-but I'm afraid if I let them too close to me that they may hurt me in the future. I think this is just a defense mechanism and that we're just protecting ourselves.

Because we're scared to let them get close.

@Ido Haha now you're just saying that so I don't feel that rejected! XD

That's what I've come up with so far. @lemony