It’s official. I’ve hit new levels of dorkdom 🙄

I have a physical tomorrow and I’m putting entirely too much thought into.

Like, should I arrive early? How early? Maybe right on time so it doesn’t show that I’ve got a ton of nerves and I’m extremely eager to get it out of the way. Or a few minutes late so I can see how happy they truly are to see that I showed up?

Do I shave my legs even though they really don’t need it? …what about my cooch even though it’s not that kind of exchange and she’s already well taken care of?

Considering there will be a lot of close contact, can you die from ingesting too much Listerine?

Do I dress casual or more put together like I have a ton of plans that day so it looks like this is just a walk in the park for me?

Do I spritz my perfume, like, everywhere? I mean, how much perfume is too much perfume? And is every inch of my skin needing that kind of love just in case I find myself in naked and vulnerable positions?

In regards to the results coming back, do I end the encounter with a “Call me!”…or do I wait for them to call me like three days later as I find myself tugging at my bottom lip in constant anticipation?


…this is apparently the closest thing I’ve had to a date in years so these questions are important.