I Want to Know

What's that?

@BelaTattoo: if I care for her.. I'll be able to fully appreciate whatever size her boobs happen to be.

@coppercoil: And if you don't care for her all that much? What then?

@sarabee1995: Then I think he should not engage in anything cuz that might make her feel like he likes her when he doesn't

@sarabee1995: this is a brutally difficult question. Nectarine, orange, or grapefruit. Then it depends on body type. So a skinny girl can rock little titties just fine.. but a big girl will struggle to look good with them. Middle girl has much more flexibility to pull of bigger to middle. A petite girl might look strange with too big of titties. So then it becomes about body frame to boob ratio.

@coppercoil: clearly you have carried out detailed study of this, but have failed to reach any true insight into how it feels to have breasts, any size, and to have them appraised in this cold manner.

@Yulianna: did you read my first reply ?

@coppercoil: context?

@Yulianna:

[quote] if I care for her.. I'll be able to fully appreciate whatever size her boobs happen to be. [/quote] was my original reply to the question. Then was pressed how I would judge if I didn't care for the girl. I was honest. I'm highly flawed and been judged hashly myself for various male attributes by women, so please don't think I'm on some high horse. It's just the reality of individual preferences.

@coppercoil: if i care for her, ok... ?otherwise i will judge like a piece of meat in butcher's window... these are people! why is that so difficult for men to realise?

@coppercoil: i think "if i care for her... " is really code for "if i think i can get my hands on her... " so then you don't care about size, shape, anything else.

@Yulianna: that's so rough.

I recognize your hurt is real, and out of respect for that genuine hurt I apologize for my words adding to that hurt.

That's all I will say further on this subject. I hope you have a good rest of your evening

@Yulianna: Thank you, my love, for jumping in here while I slept peacefully dreaming if you!

@coppercoil: I do not believe Yulia's comments have anything to do with any historical hurt in her life. Nor do I believe, knowing her the way I do, that your words here could possibly inflict any hurt upon her.

Rather, I think she is expressing to you that your comments betray an attitude that is offensive to many women and that is all too pervasive in our culture.

If she is heavy, she better have boobs, small ones are okay if she's a size 2 and starving herself to death, but too big on that skinny frame doesn't work for you either. Thank God in heaven above that we have you to help us define true female beauty!

Yes, I know this is a story about boob size written by another of my good friends, but your answer reveals a thought process that is not just "being honest" but deeply flawed and harsh. I know you said you were done with the topic, so I won't press you for an answer, but please think about your feelings in this area and try to imagine the converse.

@sarabee1995: so basically you are shaming me for stating out loud what is the general consensus for society as a whole when it comes for feminine beauty as it relates to body types?

So in your heart you believe if you silence all those who's opinions reflect reality, you will have fixed something somehow?

Do you think by saying to society that fat girls with tinny boobs should be equally seen as desirable as skinny girls with mid sized boobs, it will make it so somehow?

Do you think by saying to women that short fat balding men should be equally desired as tall, fit, men with a full head of hair, that you have made that a reality somehow?

You can say whatever you want but you will never change reality. Reality is we are genetically predisposed to find certain trait combinations more desirable than others. That will not change by shaming people who speak honestly.

You have changed nothing.. you have affected nothing.. you have wasted your time and my time.

@coppercoil: Nope, not at all. I am not trying to make anything so. I am not trying to shame you (although it is interesting that you felt my words were intended to bring on shame).

I simply asked you to think of your feelings in this area and how, when spoken, they might be perceived by others. That's all.

@coppercoil: i believe you shame yourself, without any help... and not just sexually but also intellectually. your analogy about men's appearance is nonsense. only in one area are you correct - we are wasting time, as you are unable to understand just how offensive you are.

Yulia, Sara...I think you might be coming down a little harsh on the guy. I think he's made it clear that he has no intentions to make anybody feel bad about themselves...but that naturally there is going to be three standards...societies view of astetic beauty, one's personal ideal, and the theoretical idea of beauty in one's head. I know I can sometimes have prejudgements about people based on their body and clothes at time...espeically people I dislike. lol

But like any person or stranger I care somewhat and I don't let it influence me too much...you know? No matter what features they have...or whatever...you can appreciate them for the best version of themself....too big or small or fat or unibrow or whatever. And isn't that the jist of what the guy is saying here?

@Scribbles: I hear what you are saying, but there are so many times (especially lately) when I just get so freakin' tired of being judged by breast size.

I can understand that. Maybe I don't think of those things often enough because I've always gotten the more "positive" "attentions" towards my breasts.

@Scribbles: Lol, yes, I'm quite sure you have! And I don't want to come off as less than happy with what I got. I like the way I look. But "society" has a different ideal.

@sarabee1995: I don't judge women because of their breast size unless they have plastic surgery to make them bigger...I prefer natural

@sarabee1995: what society?

@Yulianna: Good morning Yulia, my love! How are you this bright and sunny morning! Is it sunny where you are?? By society, I guess I mean American society where it seems in all things that bigger is better.

@sarabee1995: Hi Sara... cloudy, below zero! in my room, well wrapped up and cosy. for breasts certainly, bigger is not better 😌

@Yulianna: Lol ... yes, around zero here too this morning... getting warmer now. Brisk cool morning with clear blue sky; perfect running weather! Met up with Mark on my run ... you remember him? Went to Starbucks after. He wants to take me to dinner tonight.

Anyway, I'm off to work. Love ya! Miss ya! 😘🤗