Idk if you're looking for advice or just someone to listen to you. I understand where you're coming from. Many people are dealing with it. There's help out there, if you need it.

Good and bad situations happening to you have one factor in common. You. The game changes when you decide to give yourself time and space to breath, and then return back to the game with a mindset that it's gonna be the best day of your life. Not because things are gonna get better on their own, but because you can turn things around.