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I Want to Be Positive About Life

Psychology Today
Thomas G. Plante, Ph.D, ABPP
March 18, 2020


“.... the Tend and Befriend theory

developed and researched primarily by Professor Shelly Taylor at UCLA. It suggests that during times of significant stress, we tend to turn to others for connection, support, and solidarity, even among strangers. During a pandemic, it is wonderful to hear stories about — or to personally experience — remarkable acts of kindness, compassion, and graciousness towards others. Young people offer to help elders who are unable to get food or other supplies or just people chatting amicably in long grocery lines are all heartwarming. People share surplus supplies and offer to help neighbors they may not know at all. All are examples and predictable if one understands the tend and befriend theory.”

You can read the whole article at


https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/do-the-right-thing/202003/psychology-helps-us-better-predict-crisis-behavior
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jim44444 · 70-79, M
I wonder if this is caused by a crisis or if we just are more aware because it does not fit our crisis script. The entertainment industry sells tickets to disaster movies by portraying mass hysteria and complete social breakdown as the norm to a crisis.

So now we have a crisis and people react positively (as they always do) and it surprises us. If we think about our normal reality it most likely emulates our crisis response.

If a someone is a decent person during normal times they will be a decent person during a crisis. If they are normally an asshole ...
SmartKat · 56-60, F
@jim44444 You’re probably onto something.