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Bill Clinton Says He’ll Gladly Testify On Epstein Case Just As Soon He Gets Back From This Cool Island

According to filings to the Federal Court of the southern district of New York, former President Bill Clinton says he will gladly testify on the Epstein case just as soon as he gets back from this really cool island.

Prosecutors had reached out to the former president after he had been spotted in nearly every single photo that had been released from the Epstein documents so far. Bill Clinton wrote in an email to attorneys that he is happy to share any information related to the case that he might have, but that he can't do it right away since he can't get away from this incredible island vacation he is on.

"My fellow Americans," began the President in his message to prosecutors. "I barely knew that Epstein fellow and I don't know anything about any illegal activity he was engaged in, but, whatever information I have, I can definitely share. Just wait for me to get back. I'm still on island time."

When prosecutors asked which island he was at, Bill Clinton replied by simply saying, "That's classified. Former presidential privilege."

At publishing time, Bill Clinton sent prosecutors another email with pictures of him on the island surrounded by beautiful women to prove that he really was on the island and couldn't make it into the courtroom just yet to testify.
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AthrillatheHunt · 51-55, M
NGL both him and Hilldog are looking good these days . Like finally well rested and not stressed. They look 10 years younger than they did in 2025.
Thinkerbell · 41-45, F
At publishing time, it was also disclosed that former President Clinton had been rushed to the island hospital, where he was diagnosed as having overdosed on Viagra, a serious condition for a man of his age, exclusive sources close to the matter said.
Vin53 · M
When does trump's subpoena get served? He and Epstein were BFFs for 13yrs.
AthrillatheHunt · 51-55, M
@Vin53 dude both sides had all the info and could have used it to bury the other side . That leaves 2 possible conclusions : everyone is guilty , or no one is guilty (I lean towards nobody is guilty )
Vin53 · M
@AthrillatheHunt The cast of characters reads like a rogues gallery of pervs. Woody Allen, Prince Williams, Bill Clinton and stinky orange meister himself. Can't wait til its all released as long as it wasn't corrupted.
AthrillatheHunt · 51-55, M
@Vin53 well if it’s both sides then it will never see the light of day
Vin53 · M
When Comer was talking to the press today he was surrounded by congress folk, some who have also ignored subpoenas issued by congress, so apparently there are no limits to the GOP's depth of hypocrisy.

 
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