What does Israel gain by supporting a ceasefire?

Washington politicians sounded the alarm Tuesday that a ceasefire agreement brokered by President Trump between Israel and Iran may be a slippery slope that leads to peace in the Middle East.

Democrats criticized Trump's involvement in Israel and Iran's war, calling it unconstitutional and blasting it for threatening peace in the region.

"No one wants that," said Senator Chuck Schumer. "Peace opens up the frightening possibility of no war. Not on my watch!"

"Death!" he added. "I like death!"

New York Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez slammed the ceasefire as a sham, saying it requires Iran to stop launching missiles at Israel. "It's preposterous," AOC said as she glanced at the word "preposterous" in her Word of the Day calendar. "If Trump brings peace to the Middle East, I'll have no choice but to admit he's a good and effective president. No one wants that!"

"We've never been this dangerously close to peace," former VP Mike Pence added.

According to sources, the Israel/Iran ceasefire could trigger a powder keg of peace that explodes across the region. Experts say that if Iran agrees to work with Israel, there will be no stopping other nations from doing the same, and that's bad business for the military-industrial complex. "If there's peace, what are we going to blow up?" questioned Lockheed Martin CEO Bret Lockheed. "What are we going to do with all these bombs?"

At publishing time, Democrats successfully convinced Israel and Iran to violate the terms of their ceasefire and plunge the region into darkness.

Israel has discovered to its chagrin that it has many soft targets and that having them bombed is rather painful.


For those who are missing the irony:

Fewer dead Israelis?