Should teachers and schools be allowed to keep information about a student's pronouns or gender identity from parents?

Poll - Total Votes: 33

Yes. The child's health and well being are more important than the parent being informed.

No. Parents should get to know this information even if that puts some kids at risk.

You can only vote on one answer.

Personally I think that right now it is for a child's safety that their choice of pronouns or expressed gender identity not be relayed to the parents.
Why?
Because if the child wanted their parents to know then they would tell them. The child might not feel comfortable telling their parent just because it's awkward but it could also be a much more substantial fear of repercussions, punishment or even harm.

You have only to see how some people in this debate advocate hate and even execution to understand why it is worrying to out a trans child to certain kinds of parent.

It's just so gross how this issue has been weaponized by the political right to get cheap votes.
Just following the ol playbook "If you don't have policy, target a minority" lol

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

hartfire

It probably depends a lot on the age of the kid.
At the primary school level, maybe it would be simpler and easier to stick to gender norms.
But I'm not even sure of that.

Kids have developmental phases. Between 7 and 9 most have a very black & white view of binary norms, and have difficulty in understanding variance as normal. This is made much worse by the cultural stereotypes that surround us all.
However, that could be changed by including diversity in stories - though at a rate of 1-2% so that it is proportionate to the actual rate of gender differences in the wider population.

I think there could be a third option.
The kid talks to the school counsellor about their prefered gender identity.
The counsellor has a tactful conversation with the parents to discover how open or closed they are on gender issues.
If they are open, the counsellor can encourage the parents to have a discussion with their kid about how he/she identifies. From then on, it would make the kid far happier to feel accepted just as they/she/he is.

Generally I prefer facing all truths and dealing with them openly.
I think the more we do so, the better we become at understanding and accepting one another's differences.

But if the parents are old fashioned in their ideas about gender and/or orientation, then perhaps the counsellor should postpone telling the parents about whatever the kid has confided - and should speak with the head and the rest of the staff. That kid is going to need protection from bullying and a lot of support.

The problem is, it is exceptionally difficult to keep things quiet in a school environment. Kids go to each other's birthday parties. Parents witness how their child and it's friends behave and talk.
One way or another, if all the kids are encouraged to use a non-cisgender pronoun, that will eventually be overheard, gossiped about, and it [i]will[/i] get back to the parents.

So even the most conservative and religious parents are going to need counselling about their child's special needs - no different than if they had ADHD, autism spectrum, dyslexia or some other form of genetic difference.