If you could ask your pet 3 questions, what would they be?

Do you love me, how can I make you happy, and do you understand how adorable you are.. Sounds like a damn relationship hahaha XD

Why do you eat your own hair, would you please stop trying to get me to scratch your butt, and what are you dreaming about when you're making all those noises in your sleep ?

Why are you so damn hyper?
How come exhaustion doesn't exists in your world?
What do you dream about?

Would you like me to change anything about how we do things at the moment?
What kind of bed do you want?
Would you prefer to drink from running water?

I would ask him if there's anything I can do to make his life more enjoyable..
I would ask him if he understands that i love him very much and if he loves me too..

No questions, just statements.

You are a dog, not a prince. Your old owner spoiled you, because they were an idiot.
Don't sass me, because I don't care. I'm not buying you a entire chicken every week.
If you stand at the door without coming in, I'm locking you out.

What happened to you in the past that made you like this?
Why do you pee where you know you shouldn't?
Are you in pain, sad, how do I know if something's wrong?

Why do you pee on my pillows?
What do you do when I'm at work?
Can you please stop peeing on my oillows?

Why are you crazy kitty?
Socks,?why do you bring me dirty socks?
What is with all those dirty looks?

what if i dont have one

so what's it like having no balls?

That's all I want to know.