Upset
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So yeah, I am basically a murderer

No where would take Tommy.

None of the shelters around me, or connections I had.

I had to euthanize him. It was yesterday.

I feel disgusting. I hate myself.

The only way I can rationalize it is that I stopped him from hurting anyone else or myself further.

But it just feels awful.
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CountScrofula · 46-50, M
You're not a murderer. Never think of it that way. You did everything you could for him.
caccoon · 36-40
@CountScrofula I tried. He needed someone with more experience than me.

He was a sweet boy.
You did the best for him that anyone could have done.
its not on you...... you tried when few else would. its a sad case. hugs.
caccoon · 36-40
@ReptilianFromPlanetCrush I wish it had a better outcome
Poppies · 61-69, F
I have never known anyone with a kinder heart for animals. The poor guy was badly damaged before he met you, and you gave him a wonderful second chance.
Elessar · 31-35, M
@Poppies Exactly this. Couldn't have said it better
caccoon · 36-40
@Poppies @Elessar thank you both. I wish I was better equipped to help him
SkeetSkeet · 100+, F
You gave him a loving life and did everything you could for him 💙 what he had with you was a million times better than being beat up by crack heads.
caPnAhab · 26-30, M
caccoon · 36-40
@caPnAhab me too. I wish it wasn't this way
caPnAhab · 26-30, M
@caccoon You shouldn't beat yourself up so much. Even when it was hard you still fought to save him.
Jackaloftheazuresand · 31-35, M
Consider the other ways he would have died if you didn't exist to take him in. Who else was standing for him?
caccoon · 36-40
@Jackaloftheazuresand it's true. He was getting fed and on a routine for a month and a half. He loved to learn and was so intelligent
Jackaloftheazuresand · 31-35, M
@caccoon And that's how he got to stay(I am actually hugging you in my mind right now)

It sucks and it's unfair, unjust, cruel. I don't know that it matters but if something does then this did
caccoon · 36-40
@Jackaloftheazuresand it will always matter when an entity had been abused, hurt and killed.

Thank you for the hug 💙

I think humans need to do better.
Notsimilarreally · 31-35, F
Ah girl, I'm sorry. I considered that with Amelia and got to the point where I had to be willing when I moved to Canada, but we got really lucky and a friend took her. I told him he could have it done after I left but he kept her. Her trouble was...is....attacking other dogs. Very viciously and relentlessly, and also growled at small children. And I do think if she had the opportunity she would have attacked a child, but at that time I was never around kids very often fortunately. We just got lucky that friend is able to give her the privacy and special circumstances that she needs though it hasn't been easy. Most dogs that bite humans do not get to live out their lives. And they often have to go in terrible ways because so many feel that it's okay to kill them after they make those mistakes. It's sad, because people like us see through that... I'm sorry you had to do this. He had a good time with you, at least the end of his days were filled with care and love and all the good things a dog deserves. Now you're safe, and honestly, so is everyone. He served his purpose on this planet perhaps and perhaps will come back as a lap dog, or cat, or something more fitting 😫☮♥
caccoon · 36-40
@Notsimilarreally I'm so glad Amelia has a safe place to be!!

It is really difficult. I can see that things would have been so different for him if he were a smaller dog. Poor guy, he was a sweet baby and he just wasn't given a fair chance. He WANTED to do the right things but he was so anxious and possessive (he became possessive over me to the point I knew if anyone said "hello" to us on a walk, I knew he'd start grabbing/latching onto me), and I wasn't the right leader for him

But I am grateful to have known him for a short time and I wish I'd scooped him up sooner. He really deserved better
You did more for him than anyone else. It sucks that it had to come to this, but you were the one who went above and beyond to try and save him.
Sutten · 41-45, F

 
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