I'm a Loner Most of the Time

I don't have friends where I am, back home I have a few, but here I don't.
I made mistakes, most my own doing some were forced from circumstance, although most of those circumstances were because of something I fucked up.
Those mistakes have come around time and time again and they have ruined anything close to a friendship with these people I may have had or have ever had.
The worst part about all of this is that I am forced to be around them, and will be for a considerable time, normally I could deal with being a loner by being alone, not a problem I have been most of my life! However now that I am round the same group of people all the time knowing that they don't really want me there, that's hard. I can feel it in the air, when I walk in a room and the atmosphere changes, or when I walk out and I can hear the conversation change as I go. When I leave and spend time with different people I can feel a difference in myself, I am notably happier and time flows, the second I am back in this environment though it all changes.
I am a loner by choice but not in this situation, in this situation I am an outcast, and that's the hardest thing to admit