I Am Different [Being Different]
A common misconception about what I'm doing here (and elsewhere) is that I'm looking for someone who is like me, who I can relate to. SW, like EP before it, often feels like a whole network of support groups, people with similar problems bonding and helping each other... I understand that. There is great value in such a concept, no doubt. Also, when I initially joined EP it was most definitely what (or who) I was looking for.
Over the years my priorities have changed. You see, finding someone like me, with similar problems or a similar mindset, has proven to be so close to impossible that I treat it as such. So what am I doing here? Well, I've shifted to looking for people that don't necessarily understand or 'get' me, but who are comfortable enough in their own skin that they can let me be comfortable in mine. I like myself, and the skin I inhabit.
But, you ask, is that really your only requirement? Doesn't that apply to a ton of people? Alas, it's more difficult to find than it seems. Things often go right for a while, but given some time inevitably hidden feelings surface, deeply ingrained distaste against one or more facets of my personality or lifestyle. Distaste that makes no rational sense, mind you, and when challenged literally none of the people managed to defend it.
'Live and let live', a phrase many preach, yet few practice. Looking down on me is so popular you could market it and become a billionaire, which makes my mission difficult. You see, in order to be liked in this world one must either have a lot in common with others (I certainly do not) or to be cool enough that people like you despite, or perhaps even for being different (I certainly am not). I never really tried to do or be either.
I feel like I have something to offer that many people need, but very few realize they need. It's hard to help someone who doesn't want to be helped, but way harder to help someone who is convinced they don't need the help in the first place. Given these problems I've suspended my lifelong dream of trying to actually change the world for the better, at least in a big way. I need more resources, and likely the help of others.
Let me try to get back to where I was going with all this. I don't care how different you are from me. Age, race, gender, profession, beliefs... I could not care less. I'm looking for people who have an open mind. Who not only don't judge others just for having a different opinion or lifestyle, but embrace the variety and try to learn from it. I don't mind difficult. People can be difficult and still be worth it. I know this, because I am.
Over the years my priorities have changed. You see, finding someone like me, with similar problems or a similar mindset, has proven to be so close to impossible that I treat it as such. So what am I doing here? Well, I've shifted to looking for people that don't necessarily understand or 'get' me, but who are comfortable enough in their own skin that they can let me be comfortable in mine. I like myself, and the skin I inhabit.
But, you ask, is that really your only requirement? Doesn't that apply to a ton of people? Alas, it's more difficult to find than it seems. Things often go right for a while, but given some time inevitably hidden feelings surface, deeply ingrained distaste against one or more facets of my personality or lifestyle. Distaste that makes no rational sense, mind you, and when challenged literally none of the people managed to defend it.
'Live and let live', a phrase many preach, yet few practice. Looking down on me is so popular you could market it and become a billionaire, which makes my mission difficult. You see, in order to be liked in this world one must either have a lot in common with others (I certainly do not) or to be cool enough that people like you despite, or perhaps even for being different (I certainly am not). I never really tried to do or be either.
I feel like I have something to offer that many people need, but very few realize they need. It's hard to help someone who doesn't want to be helped, but way harder to help someone who is convinced they don't need the help in the first place. Given these problems I've suspended my lifelong dream of trying to actually change the world for the better, at least in a big way. I need more resources, and likely the help of others.
Let me try to get back to where I was going with all this. I don't care how different you are from me. Age, race, gender, profession, beliefs... I could not care less. I'm looking for people who have an open mind. Who not only don't judge others just for having a different opinion or lifestyle, but embrace the variety and try to learn from it. I don't mind difficult. People can be difficult and still be worth it. I know this, because I am.
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