I Am Different Since My Mother Died [Being Different]

I really am much worse now ... I can't even be happy and all the changes in my life have been horrible . I feel so sad and really heartbroken. She died knowing that I wouldn't be able to cope without Her ... I don't get along with my father and I never will . He would rather believe the lies people tell him about me . He's been selfish , he fails to be a real man and provide for his family ... He just doesn't care about me ... My mother cared about me but she's the one that God took ... She cared about my happiness , now look at me ... Just a depressed , sad, lonely and miserable individual