I Am Willing to Apologize When I Have Wronged
Apologising when you are wrong is one of the secrets of keeping good relationships with people including your near and dear
70-79, F
This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »
JoBlak · M
I agree that apologising and admitting that you wrong is a way to maintain good relations and needs to be done but that is just the start of the path to reconciliation. As the wrong doer, you are not in control of the process either. It also needs to be done if possible irrespective of whether it an important or an insignificant relationship as it about your own self respect.
Apologising is hard, but Forgiving that wrong is even harder and the ability to do so is a true measure of the stature of a person.
However apologising is not a reason for avoiding punishment. The process should be apologising, a suitable period of punishment for the wrong, forgiveness and reconciliation.
It saddens me that even in my own not very large family, a failure to forgive in the older generations denied me access to my sole grandparent from age 8 to 13 years old.
My mother was disinherited by my grandfather for marrying my father. He never forgave her. That rift lasted 28 years, surviving my grandfather's death, as my grandfather's will passed his entire estate to me, cutting out my mother.
I have two older cousins with whom I have had no contact ever in my life because of a row in about 1948. There was a brief thaw in mid 1980s, when I met one of my two cousins briefly, but I was then ostracized by the family myself for trying to force a reconciliation.
So yes @jennypenny, apologising is important, but the canker of non forgiveness is the killer.
Apologising is hard, but Forgiving that wrong is even harder and the ability to do so is a true measure of the stature of a person.
However apologising is not a reason for avoiding punishment. The process should be apologising, a suitable period of punishment for the wrong, forgiveness and reconciliation.
It saddens me that even in my own not very large family, a failure to forgive in the older generations denied me access to my sole grandparent from age 8 to 13 years old.
My mother was disinherited by my grandfather for marrying my father. He never forgave her. That rift lasted 28 years, surviving my grandfather's death, as my grandfather's will passed his entire estate to me, cutting out my mother.
I have two older cousins with whom I have had no contact ever in my life because of a row in about 1948. There was a brief thaw in mid 1980s, when I met one of my two cousins briefly, but I was then ostracized by the family myself for trying to force a reconciliation.
So yes @jennypenny, apologising is important, but the canker of non forgiveness is the killer.