I Am Very Affectionate

I am incredibly affectionate. I love holding hands, touching, kissing, etc. etc. but my significant other just isn't the same way.

I love him madly but in those dark recesses of my mind I wonder if I will survive with a man who loves me but can't show it.

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djjohnson · 41-45, M

Know how you feel. My wife seems to forget I'm there until she wants something. But if I want something I'm just being selfish. It makes me wonder as well. If I don't tell her I love her she gets worried and upset. And yet I'm just supposed to believe she loves me by the fact she is there.
That being said I can say this. You can live with it. If you want to. If you don't want to live with it then you wont.

cheekykitten · F

@djjohnson: He says exactly the same thing! I should know he loves me because he's there! I'm not wired like that :(

djjohnson · 41-45, M

Neither am I. But then she says it wrong to try and change her, all the while asking me to change.

UpsideOutInsideDown · 36-40, M

I'm going through the exact same dilemma. Except with my SO, not yours. It's impossibly difficult

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cheekykitten · F

That is what I am hoping to avoid! He loves me in the best way he knows how, why isn't that good enough for me?

UpsideOutInsideDown · 36-40, M

Because it isn't the love you want. Affection is a lot like food, and everyone has a different idea of what tastes good and what fills them up. Some of us are just a lot more hungry than others

cheekykitten · F

Well using that analogy - I learnt to love olives, can I learn to love this?

Dreammmer · 56-60, M

How long have you been with him and how likely do you think is an ending of the love from your side?

cheekykitten · F

@Dreammmer: We've been together for just over a year now. And in the bigger scheme of things he is pretty perfect so I should be able to put this aside, shouldn't I?

Dreammmer · 56-60, M

@cheekykitten: I do not know you and I dont know him. A year is often a critical point in time where a couple either splits or works out on the differences and stays together.
You say he is pretty perfect. Not being able to show his love to you... is not a side issue and on the long run you either make your peace with it or you will be unhappy. Or he seeks help and learns to show his love.

UndeadPrivateer · 31-35, M

I'm the same way. Sounds like torture, honestly.

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cheekykitten · F

Sadly yes. I wish things were different. But in the bigger scheme of things this isn't the worst issue in the world is it?

UndeadPrivateer · 31-35, M

@cheekykitten: Could be worse. Then again, things can always get worse. Best of luck with it and I hope it works out okay for you.

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Justme5969 · 61-69, M

Wow, that would be very difficult!

cheekykitten · F

@Justme5969: It can be but I also feel really bad for feeling this way as he is a really incredible man

Justme5969 · 61-69, M

@cheekykitten: wishing you the very best sweetheart! I am a "touchy" kind of guy....I like holding hands, kissing in public, ect

cheekykitten · F

@Justme5969: You SO is a lucky lady!

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