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Still cannot decide.

Something i really need to make a decision on.
She has asked if i will commit to being more than just friends.
My past failure is part of the reason holding me back from committing.

Edit -- I think some of you may have misunderstood, as my post did not reveal much.
She and me are not in a relationship currently.
She wants to be more than friends, and has asked if i would consider it. I hope that makes it clearer.

Should i go for it? Should i not? Should i tell her what is holding me back? 馃
To do or not to do. That is the tuna of all cans.

Carissimi61-69, F
There is more to consider than a past failure. Think of these, weigh them up, and make your best guess.
FoxesF
You should tell her what is holding you back, especially if you are considering entering a relationship with her. You need to be honest about these things.
Jaydee731-35, M
@Foxes There is something else holding me back, other than the past. This is about the present time. And it's an extremely silly reason lol.
There might be learning from regrets in the past, but hopefully you don't let them dictate you? You aren't giving much and I'm betting it's a personal question.
FrozenWasteland61-69, M
I could be way out of line here, but it seems to me that this might be a decision you two should make together. Like have a real conversation about.

If you are friends, and she has put it out there that she would like more, maybe it's ok for you to be open with her too. And for heaven's sake don't start making assumptions about what she's going to like or not or how she's going to feel. That's for her to decide, not you.

I wish you the best...
Dainbramadge51-55, M
Well of course you should tell her why.
Doesn't she deserve to know?
TexChikF
Can you stand to lose her if you dont?
Jaydee731-35, M
@TexChik I dont know
Casheyane26-30, F
Why is everything you write coming back to tuna references haha?
It's your call, and your consequences to bear. No one else can make the choice for you.
Jaydee731-35, M
@Casheyane There is a user here, i like his posts a lot lol. He has tuna in his name
Casheyane26-30, F
@Jaydee7 ah. haha
Do you like her?

Would you value her more as a friend than a partner?

What do you want, and what is best for you and your mental stability right now?
Jaydee731-35, M
@caccoon Those are great questions.
I value her as a wonderful person. I value her as a friend. I cannot afford to lose a friend like her if things go wrong, and i fail, like i usually do, and inevitably will.

What i want is for my mind to stop. Just stop, and let me be at peace.
@Jaydee7 sounds like not the best time for a relationship 馃挋
was it your coworker that lured you with a sw dinner?
Jaydee731-35, M
@darkerlongings And this is why we cannot be friends 馃槀
馃弮馃挩
because i told you the truth or because i just rubbed it in? I AM LITERALLY THE BEST FRIEND YOU CAN EVER HAVE!!! 馃槄馃槇 @Jaydee7
Jaydee731-35, M
@darkerlongings Because you rubbed it and rubbed it till a genie came out of the lamp.
Now poof the genie before it wrecks havoc 馃う Best friend my behind! 馃檮
CookieCrumbsF
You should tell her what鈥檚 holding you back. Give her the chance to know you that way.
Jaydee731-35, M
@CookieCrumbs That is only part of what is holding me back. The other part, she will not like to hear i think.
CookieCrumbsF
@Jaydee7
It鈥檚 not fair that you are deciding that for her.

Is that other part about what you think of her or feel about her?
Jaydee731-35, M
@CookieCrumbs No, not about what i feel about her at all.
You need a magic 8 ball
Jaydee731-35, M
@SophieSmiles One cannot just say that, without providing said magic ball 馃槫 Conjure one, immediately!
Jaydee731-35, M
@SophieSmiles I call scam. Scam scam scam
BeefySenpieM
You shouldn't. I doubt she wants commitment if you're doubting
Pinkstarburst51-55, F
This is a honest conversation you should have with her.
Becks048F
You need to be honest with her if you are having any doubts
Go on your solo path, if only you can.
Just be honestly with her
No games ...
LRain
If you had to lose her as a friend anyway.. would you rather loose her as a platonic friend or as an ex? Because she wants more than friendship and if she cant get that from you then she will eventually get it from someone else.. so.. there鈥檚 that
iamonfire69636-40, F
You should talk to her about what鈥檚 holding you back. If she doesn鈥檛 like it then it鈥檚 not meant to be.

 
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