Question for guys

@Picklebobble2

"Withholding sex prior to marriage is no different from withholding money once married. Is it ?"

Well no because it's PRIOR to marriage. Marriage should change things. You should become "as one"

@CrazyChick21 Yes, that's true. I suppose I also see more of a connection between sex and real commitment than most guys do.

@Freetime sex is also at its best when there's real loving connection and you're more likely to find that with someone who loves you enough to wait.

@CrazyChick21 I agree. I like the way you think.

@Wifetheboss what's wrong with a big wedding and what is classed as big anyway?

@CrazyChick21 Who is paying for it. For men, having sex with someone they love makes them feel loved. We feel loved afterward. This is why a man can be treated poorly, but after sex with the GF/wife, everything is OK. Now, if a guy is turned down to many times, the pain is real. We understand not wanting to have sex, but if rejected too many times, the man will suffer in silence and stop asking, or he will find someone else. My wife did this, and I blew up and told her I was looking for another woman who would love me. She did not realize we were in a sexless marriage.

As for a big wedding, A woman has one shot at a big wedding because everything is new: the love, the couple's love. Everyone is happy for them. After that, it is stale news. It does not carry the same excitement. Your friends will fake it and pretend they are happy for you. They prefer a small wedding.

@Wifetheboss

I never wanted a big showy wedding the first time. I favour a good party though. We had about 80 people, a barn dance and a bumper buffet. That's doable and doesn't cost the earth.

I agree that men show love through touch and need sex but I don't think it's wrong to make it clear that sex is only going to happen after marriage. Sex is an emotional thing, it really causes hurt when you do it with the wrong person. I also strongly believe in marriage vows and how you make a vow to honor a person with your body so sex is not something that anyone should be withholding after marriage. I know it's healing and brings couples closer.

@BuzzedLightyear what do you mean?

@CrazyChick21 so curious, aren't you?

@swirlie I knew it too! Lol

@Softy1
Nothing like being the last one to know why all the girls keep staring at you, huh?!

@swirlie why would the girls be staring at me? Something in my teeth? Lol

@Wifetheboss what if the woman was widowed not divorced? Would that change things? I think if divorced, you'd talk about the reasons why the divorce happened. I wouldn't want to marry anyone without properly discussing sex but I would be prepared to wait if I needed to.

@CrazyChick21 Being in a sexless relationship is very painful. You'd have to talk a lot. We are no longer teenagers. No need to not enjoy sex before marriage the second time.

@MrVintage71 if I'm marrying him, I'm trusting that it works if he says it does.

@CrazyChick21 YES,so you should 💓

@ReptilianFromPlanetCrush does that mean you are respectfully waiting or does it mean you're humouring her whilst wondering how long it's going to take for her to crack? 😂

@CrazyChick21 i have seen way too many crack and start ripping off the clothes after a few dates. i do gotta give them extra points for trying to hold out. LOL

@ReptilianFromPlanetCrush it would be tough not to I have to admit.

@TheDeathOCuHullainn do you not think you would feel that through kissing and touch and how she responded in conversation?

@CrazyChick21 Perhaps you might get an indication, but it is not the same

@TheDeathOCuHullainn that is very true. It's much easier for virgins to remain chaste, they don't know what they are missing.

@DHggmu
Let me put it this way... have you ever known a guy who called his mother to get her opinion of a girl he'd just met after describing her on the phone, before he would ask that girl out on a date?

Those are the types I mean.

@swirlie I can’t say I’ve ever heard of anyone doing that.. I have no words.

@DHggmu
Well, for your sake, I'm really happy that you don't have any guy-friends who are like that, believe me!

@Tminus6453 what if you are doing a lot of other things and you can see that it's hard for her too?

@CrazyChick21 My answer is still the same, she wouldnt be the one for me