Sometimes I feel stuck in the past when it comes to sexuality...

I never fantasized much about it, but have been more or less dragged into a few experiences I ended up enjoying. Now my fantasies are pretty much limited to repeating those, but that's not going to happen because the spontaneity and wondering what would happen next was part of the fun. I can't work towards a woman surprising me, and whatever anyone does from here on will be in the context of what I've already experienced rather than discovering a whole new concept.

My sex life for the past years and foreseeable future is reminiscing over past experiences, hoping something similar would happen again, knowing full well it won't, and ending disappointed and frustrated. 🥲

EDIT, as some people asked me what I hope for: I've mostly enjoyed banter and teasing around casual nudity with women, as well as talking about each other's experiences and fantasies. It would be great to meet a woman to do that more with, and who's willing to take the lead in exploring some new things.