Top ten reasons why you might walk off with top secret government documents

10. They were ferrel documents and they followed you home.

9. You had one too many and they started looking good to you.

8. If you stare at them real hard and at just the right angle 3D sailboats and dolphins jump out at you.

7. Girls think your're hot if you've got folders labeled Top Secret laying all over your bedroom.

6. You were baking a cake and documents were the last ingredient.

5. You didn't have time to stop for milk on the way home and thought documents might work with your Fruity Pebbles.

4. You hang them from your rear view mirror while cruising for chicks.

3. They're like record album covers: you lay on the bed and stare at them while you're stoned.

2. You dress them up in frilly doll clothes and hold tea parties.
"Hello Mrs Nuclear, one lump or two?"

And the number one reason you'd walk off with secret government documents...

[b]You want to sell them to rival nations for boatloads of money and favors[/b]
And if you get caught you can count on Fox to run interference by citing reasons 2 through 10 endlessly.