I was much happier when I believed that when we die we go into oblivion and cease to exist. Then NDE's made me think there was life after death.

I wasn't happy about life after death but because the people describe the after-life as a heavenly place I accepted it.
Then I saw a documentary about The Tibetan Book Of The dead which explains the after-life and It made me afraid of dying.
Now I dont know what happens after death .... I still want Death tho even just for something new!