I Hate Sociopaths

Have you ever encountered someone that appeared to be articulate, attractive, well spoken (among other traits) yet something was just not right? You could be encountering an antisocial personality disorder such as sociopaths, narcissists or borderline personality disorder.

I don’t mean to simplify this topic because it is anything but simple. I also am not a psychologist but I have encountered MANY of these types of people. I do need to check the current stats, but I read 1 in 25 are sociopaths of some type. What are the chances you are working with one?

It took a tragedy for me to put a label on it, but one thing I noticed is there is always drama with these people. Either they provide it or they provoke it out of you. That is the number one clue. I watched 2 sisters at work climb over people to get to the top. They did this by stepping on not over people.

To be honest, these people are nuts with a twist….they don’t have a conscience. They will lay traps for you and you feel you are right and walk right into it.

I posted a similar story on EP about 2 events that occurred. One of the sociopaths (they told me so) said I was not right. I began a conversation with him and he told me how he was stealing from the company, a fellow employee caught him so he set HIM up to take the fall. Very calm and collect over the whole incident. Scary, right?

How did I get the label? I married one. Awful experience. He had all the tell tale signs but I was too young to see.

Back in 2007, I lost my only daughter. As a parent, you can only imagine the grief. I was not functioning. A sociopath at work tried to make my grief look as if I had lost my mind and could not do my job. I was in grief counselling for over 9 months. As he heard the story, he put the label on it. He recommended a couple of books (Without Conscience and Sociopath Next Door). The sociopath I talked to on EP liked Without Conscience the best. He felt he was more accurate ( no lie). I have read everything I can on this subject.
I was coping with grief and thought I was going to lose my job. The lady who was setting me up told my boss that I threatened to hurt her, hit her and kill her. Everyone knew I never said that and it was the turning point of her job at work but I had to go before HR and state my case.

The problem is you will find yourself in a vortex of emotions where they are manipulating you. It is scary and you will be battle scarred. Your best bet is to avoid anyone you think might be a little off so as to not get drawn into their scary world.

Flenflyys · 31-35, F

I've not dated one but have met a few in my career as a psych RN. They only interact with you if they see a use in you, otherwise you're useless to them. I'm sorry that you were taken advantage of by some. I find it interesting that you've encountered so many.

Btw I've read both without conscience and sociopath next door as well as snakes in suits. Great books, my type of stuff.

akindheart · 61-69, F

Carissimi...thank you for responding. My exhusband was one of the quiet ones. He would provoke me into drama. the other problem is they seek out people they want to punish...it is their game and sport. you can't always avoid them. I know.

Texicanian · 70-79, M

I can identify with so much of what you say. You do seem to have some advantage in that these people are at least talking to you some of the time, as opposed to doing so mostly behind your back. You have more that enough relational skils to be able to work out much of what is realy going on, this is a plus. One thing I have found ( as have others i have spoken to about similar situations) is that thinking through possible scenarios with them & how you might respond helps you to do so more effecively. Elsewhere you speak of listening to your inner voice, & I would suggest that when such possibilities occur, this is one of the ways in which it speaks to you.

Stay Strong